The OJCL Torch Fall 2020 | Page 7


7. Dionysus (modern equivalent: Matthew) - the drunk uncle, trying his best but not really. Knows all the family drama. Will eat the entire bowl of mashed potatoes as an appetizer.

6. Artemis (modern equivalent: Charlotte)- lovely girl, kind of sassy. probably has russet hair. Great fashion. Kind of iconic.

5. Demeter (modern equivalent: Cordelia) - wants to be a librarian when she grows up. Went through a twilight phase. Favorite shape is a dodecagon.

4. Poseidon (modern equivalent: Archibald) - doing his best. Probably thinks that his high school football career is the most important thing that will ever happen to or for him. Loves his pet sea monkeys. Has had them for ten years, doesn’t know his mom replaces the sea monkey’s when they die.

3. Hephaestus (modern equivalent: Nigel) - he gets brownie points because Zeus basically just decided he was ugly and threw him off.

2. Hades (modern equivalent: Dylan) - the chill dad. Doesn’t show emotion, loves suits. Will cry if his kids dress as him on superhero day. Loves Halloween.

1. Athena (modern equivalent: Genevieve) - absolute legend. Wears frog earrings. Swears on cottagecore. Favorite drink is mint chamomile tea. Will help you with your math homework at two in the morning.