On Accepting Love by Tim Wanner , Cincinnati Province Companion
Tim Wanner made his first covenant in October 2016 while serving time in prison . This is a reflection that he wrote sharing the experience of making covenant with the community .
My journey to becoming a Precious Blood Companion has been great . It has been difficult and stressful at times , but it has been and continues to be a very positive experience .
I knew about and was introduced to the Society by my Dad , who is an Amicus . He introduced me to Pat Large , who was my sponsor and continues to be a good friend and mentor .
I wrote to Pat a letter of introduction and expressed interest in the Companions Movement . At the time she was the convener of the Carthagena , Ohio group . After consulting with the group and the group ’ s sponsor , I was invited to begin deliberations .
From the very onset , the community was extremely kind and welcoming to me . A few people from the group immediately began writing me . Also , a couple of c . pp . s . members took an interest in me . Pat and her husband Jim began visiting me in person almost immediately .
So , going from not having almost any outside friends or moral support to being instantly loved and embraced by strangers really touched me very deeply .
Deliberations and formation was an excellent time for me to grow spiritually . The format was great . There were chapters filled with information either on spirituality or the history and current structure of the Society . The great thing is that the reflection questions weren ’ t “ yes ” or “ no .” They were “ How do you feel ?” and “ What do you think ?” To answer these questions , I really had to ponder the material — meditate on it . And I think that the process helped the material to take root in me . The group was always very positive in the acceptance of my reflections . They respected my subjective experience and positively encouraged me .
That acceptance and respect is and was a lesson to me , which has helped me to continue to grow spiritually .
As time has gone by I have made a few good Precious Blood friends , both Companions and members . My friends have helped me on my journey as well . They have been extremely supportive . They have accepted me as I am . With my many faults , they don ’ t judge . They love .
I must put the support and love of the community into context . Two years ago , there was only one person on the planet who cared about me . My entire family had disowned me except my Dad . I had no outside friends and you never know if you can trust your “ inside of prison ” friends . Then after introduction to the community I had and have many friends . Some who actually love me . Love me like family .
Just writing this gets my eyes misty . The instant love and acceptance is unequaled . I feel that God has blessed me abundantly .
This support was something that , in a way , was very stressful to me . I was afraid that I would lose it . That I would , that I could , do something to lose this loving acceptance . It hasn ’ t been until recently that I have accepted that these people , you people , have accepted me . As I am . With my faults . And that it is one of the marks of Precious Blood spirituality — to accept and love people unconditionally and not based on performance . There aren ’ t words to describe the grace that has been bestowed upon me through the Companions and members of the c . pp . s .
As many know , I made my first covenant in October 2016 . The Provincial himself , a very kind and caring man , sat across a prison waiting room table from me , accepted my covenant , prayed with me and gave me his blessing . This man , Fr . Larry Hemmelgarn , who has business and appointments all over the world , took time out of his busy schedule to love me in person . Praise and Thanksgiving be evermore to Jesus ! What else can be said ?
Then on top of all this I began receiving cards , letters , and well wishes from Precious Blood people all
10 • The New Wine Press • February 2017