to pick him up wearing only a trenchcoat
10. A trenchcoat has big roomy pockets for furry handcuffs, parking or bus fare, and is a great place to keep the big “WELCOME HOME” sign.
9. Lots of famous people wear trenchcoats; such as federal agents, superheroes or villains, detectives, Rick Astley, Carmen Sandiego and Silent Bob. People will think you are a real somebody if you wear dark sunglasses with your trenchcoat.
8. It looks really dramatic if you spin around when wearing a trenchcoat, especially if you’re totally nude underneath.
7. Since it’s the only thing you’re wearing (other than high heels and maybe sunglasses) it’s nice to know that a trenchcoat will keep you warm.
6. It will only take you a few minutes to choose the rest of your "welcome home outfit" before picking him up at the airport.
5. A trenchcoat will distract him from noticing your red, weepy eyes and dark circles.
4. It’s bulky and will hide that extra weight you’ve put on since he left.
3. It’s much easier to get into and out of than several layers of clothing.
2. He’ll think it’s totally sexy.
and the number one reason to wear a trench coat....
1. He will be able to hide under it with you for your on-the-way-home, “pull-over-to-the-side-of-the-road-right-now” backseat tryst.
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