not clearly stating your needs , concerns or offering relevant constructive criticism ?
Awareness is everything . Just noticing where we shut ourselves down ( or up ) is the start of changing the pattern .
2 . Give yourself permission to TAKE YOUR TIME to build up your courage & get clear .
Speaking truth is a muscle we build . Sometimes , we need a little extra nudge or the ‘ inner cheerleader ’ to encourage us to fully express ourselves . Instead of beating yourself up for not saying what you really wanted to on that phone call , congratulate yourself for noticing the habit of avoidance or sugarcoating . Then , make a vow to call the person back or set an appropriate time to revisit the conversation .
Sometimes , it takes awhile to develop the clarity of what we really want to say and how . It may be necessary to remove ourselves from the emotion of the moment and pause to drop into your center , or Core Self , and feel what is underneath the surface and needs to be said .
3 . TRUST that “ The Truth Shall Set You Free ”.
Yes , this is a nearly universal tenet in the world ’ s ancient wisdom traditions ( the Bible , the Yoga Sutras ).
In yoga , Satya , or Truth , is the second ( only after non-violence ) of 10 lifestyle foundations ( yamas and niyamas ) that naturally set us up for freedom and happiness .
Unequivocally , when we live a life based in truth ( actions and words ), we are happier . It may be the road less traveled , and seem a little more arduous at times , but all those little ways we lie to ourselves and each other clog and sap our energy and unconsciously hold us back from what we really want . We end up wasting a lot of time when we drag our feet and stall instead of facing the music . Often we end up depressed or negative and aren ’ t sure why – but our energy is actually turning in on itself and on some level we feel this self-abandonment and mistrust .
Truth cuts through illusion . When we speak truth , we are wielding a sword . It slices the fog of illusion and sugarcoating . This will liberate every single relationship you have and not only set you free , but every other person in the circumstance or moment , as well .
4 . Have NO ATTACHMENT to how or if your Truth is received .
Your Truth is subjective . It may not be anyone else ’ s truth or they may very well have their own version of it . However , your Truth is valid ! It deserves to be spoken . It deserves to be heard . We can ’ t control someone else ’ s perception , but we can give our truth a voice .
Before you begin to speak , take a moment to drop in & let go : – Feel into your center . – Take a couple deep breaths . – Get grounded and dissolve your attachment to any outcome . – Release your attachment to it being heard or validated in any way from the outside .
– Know that speaking truth and standing up for your inner voice is enough .
5 . Practice this affirmation : “ My voice is necessary . What I have to say is valuable .”
Many of us did not have role models who demonstrated healthy communication . Perhaps , you had a sibling who was always dominating the conversation and you could never get a word in edgewise . Or you were one in a long line of siblings and home was chaotic , loud and overwhelming . Maybe , your mother always deferred to your father and never voiced her true opinions and feelings . Or maybe your family was living a pack of lies to cover up alcoholism , sexual abuse or family secrets . These patterns are deeply ingrained and it ’ s necessary to lay down new tracks in the unconscious mind .
Practice this mantra every time you feel yourself hesitating to speak your honest opinion and state your needs :
“ My voice is necessary . What I have to say is valuable .”
Give yourself permission to be heard . Your truth is just as valuable as everyone else ’ s !
Speak your truth — not just out loud , but in the written word , too .
BY : Ashley Turner , M . A ., MFTI yoga / meditation teacher , registered Marriage + Family Therapist Intern , writer , speaker and Initiated Priestess .
Ashley has graced such lists as :
• MindBodyGreen – 100 Women to Watch in Wellness
• DETAILS magazine – Top 6 Personal Trainers in 2014
• Dr . Oz ’ s Share Care . com – # 2 Online Influencer for Stress Relief
• Wall Street ’ s M + A Associates – 40 Under 40 ( Health / Wellness industry )
• Yoga Journal – Who ’ s Who in Power Yoga She is the creator of :
• 10 best-selling yoga dvds
• Meditation 101 – An Online Conference ( over 25,000 participants in 2014 ). 30 + interviews with leaders in neuroscience , meditation , psychotherapy + mindfulness
• Co-author of Aroma Yoga : Using Essential Oils in Yoga + Life
• Women Ignite Online Conference
• Co-Founder of Urban Priestess
• How to Meditate Online Course
• Founder of Yoga . Psyche . Soul . Deep , witty and laser focused , she draws on the source texts of yoga while incorporating the best of neurobiology , Jungian Psychology , ayurveda , tantra , shamanism and priestess work – vigorously challenging students and clients from the inside out . As the Artist-in-Residence at Montage Laguna Beach , Ashley launched Montage ’ s signature monthly yoga – mind – body workshops . Ashley is a sought after presenter at international events and conferences and contributor to top tier media publications including Self , Shape , Mantra , Origin , Women ’ s Health , Yoga Journal and Natural Health . Ashley consults Hollywood creatives , distinguished CEOs , couples , adolescents and individuals . With a diverse palate and ability to speak directly to her audience , Ashley has toured with rock stars , lectured in academic settings and led transformational events worldwide . She lives by the beach in Marina Del Rey , California . For details regarding private yoga and worldwide
SKYPE or phone sessions , please contact Ashley at
AshleyTurner . org
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