The Business Exchange Swindon & Wiltshire Edition 45: Oct/Nov 2019 | Page 35
IS IT ME?
IS IT ME?
John Davies is a senior corporate partner at leading commercial law firm Thrings. In each edition of TBE John
addresses a topical news or business-related issue. This time he’s trying his hand at political poetry, again.
Friends, in the midst of these oh-so-troubled times there is one thing that’s constantly been on my mind. One persistent Brexit-related problem
and I can’t keep it in anymore. It’s been a while since I wrote one of my awful poems, but I felt the need to share:
LAURA KUENSSBERG NEEDS A KIP
Thrings
@ThringsLaw
www.thrings.com
You’ve got to feel sorry for Laura, when does
she get to kick back?
She’s on first thing in the morning, and at
night when I climb in the sack.
She’s on the telly at lunchtime, the radio too
in between,
She’s either on the airwaves, or right there
on the small screen. I didn’t feel sorry for Laura, post-Newsnight
four years ago,
When the big job came knocking, she said
“of course I’ll give it a go”.
Who knew Mr Cameron’s thinking? Who
knew he’d say “peeps, you decide”?
Not Laura I guess, she said yes to the job,
her face bursting with pride. I’m quite concerned about Laura, with so
much on her plate,
Reporting on political ups and downs,
staying calm and never irate.
With Beth Rigby at Sky looking over,
Kuenssberg’s in full tilt,
Commenting on state goings-on in her
distinctive Glaswegian lilt.
When does Laura have downtime? When is
she able to eat?
She must be flippin’ knackered, she’s always
on her feet.
I know she’s got Norman beside her, and
Pienaar’s not far away,
But it’s always poor Laura on the goggle-box,
from first thing ’til the end of the day. They’re always asking her questions, old
Marr and that man Neil,
What does the word ‘prorogue’ mean? Which
laws will they repeal?
Live questions can be tricky and can
sometimes cause a fog,
And she needs Roget’s Thesaurus when
conversing with the Mogg. So what can we do about Laura? Well,
Westminster’s now shut for five weeks.
If my maths is correct, and it usually is, that’s
about thirty-five sleeps.
So I plead with you Ms Kuenssberg, take
some time away from our screens,
And when you wake up, it may all be ok, and
not falling apart at the seams.
I guess she does Amazon shopping, Ocado
and groceries online,
There’s no way she’s shopping at
Sainsbury’s, there’s no way she has the time.
There’s no way she’s been on vacation, she
can’t have, there isn’t the space,
Go turn on your telly I dare you, for there
you’ll see Laura’s face. Poor Laura has seen off Theresa, before that
she saw off our Dave,
She may see off Boris and Corbyn, who
knows, but it’s looking quite grave.
She’s witnessed the circus unfolding,John
Bercow inside the big top,
She’s there with a mic and a camera, as
democracy here goes pop! John Davies
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THE BUSINESS EXCHANGE 2019
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