That's A Moray Press February 2014 | Page 3

                                                      Bad News. There  is  no  doubt  that  the  cause  of  all  of  society’s  problems  is  the   direct  result  of  perverse  incentives  alcohol.  Luckily,  however,  the   cleverest  of  people  in  Australia  (read:  politicians)  are  finally  helping  us   all  with  new  laws.  The  best  of  these  new  laws  is  possibly  the  NSW   LIQUOR  STORES  MUST  CLOSE  AT  TEN,  LOL  law.     People  who  decide  to  engage  in  combat  whilst  drunk  wait  until  after   ten  pm  to  BUY  THEIR  ALCOHOL  FROM  LIQUOR  STORES!  This  is  a  VERY   hardcore  thing  to  do  and  normal,  non-­‐violent  people  don’t  think  this   way  or  ever,  even  occasionally,  find  they  want  to  buy  a  bottle  of  wine   after  ten  pm  to  go  with  a  spontaneous  late  night  dinner.   The  beautiful  thing  about  this  is  that  it  doesn’t  ever  affect  regular   citizens  only  MEAN  AND  BAD  CRIMINALS.  As  a  result  of  forcing  liquor   stores  in  NSW  to  shut  their  doors  at  ten  pm,  violent  citizens  looking   for  a  fight  and  ONLY  violent  citizens  looking  for  a  fight,  will  not  be  able   to  buy  the  alcohol  they  intend  to  drink  before  their  scheduled  attempt   at  combat.  Since  these  terrible  villains  are  incapable  of  buying  alcohol   at  any  other  time  they  won’t  ever  attain  alcohol  again  and  will   therefore  never  again  pick  a  fight  with  the  unsuspecting.  Now  NSW   will  be  just  as  peaceful  as  Queensland.