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These days , with my
Photo by Helen Abrams iPhone close at hand in my work bag , I would probably look up the name of the young man and the date of the shipwreck , and thus learn more about him . How his family must have suffered ! How long did it take them to learn of his loss ? Every name I record is the title of a profound and glorious human story , you know . From the greatest to the least , from the most famous names to those of whom we have never heard . It ’ s sacred work !
This year , as always on Memorial Day , my husband and I came to the Cemetery and gathered a half dozen or so of the flags offered at the entrance . We found a spot we had not been to before , and walked about slowly , reading the inscriptions , with flags in hand . Each time we found the monument of a veteran , we placed a flag there . This last Memorial Day we honored veterans of the Civil War , the Spanish- American War , World War I and World War II . One person was a Major and Army Surgeon ; his family was so proud of him that when they laid his widow to rest , his titles were included again in her inscription .
And then there are the monuments , placed at no trifling expense to the families , engraved thus :
John Smith 1848 —
See , John ’ s family did not know that a place for him had been prepared . Or they did not want to use it . In either case , how sad this makes me .
Let us count our blessings . Consider this inscription :
Caroline Died Sept . 18 1808 Aged 4 yrs . 1 week Eliza Ann Died Feb . 1 1811 Aged 20 months William Henry Died May 25 1812 Aged 7 months Mary Ann Died Oct . 18 1818 Aged 2 years 6 months Children of Matthew S . and Ann
Inward , to grief .
When Alyson and I spotted the groundhog , I could never have imagined that not too many years into the future , my husband and I would be purchasing our own monument , and that we would shortly join that blessed crowd of mourners whose words I had been recording for so long . But that is the nature of our existence , isn ’ t it — not to see the future . Probably a good thing , don ’ t you think , on the whole ?
Now , I , and the family , have always known that when my time comes , I will be cremated , and my remains are to go in a place far from here , deeply important to me . But our older daughter , Susannah , said , “ But Mommy ! Alyson and I will need a place to go , to visit !”
So after some discussion with the daughters , my husband and I purchased memorial space on Willow Knoll . When I blanched at the cost , he said , “ Think of this as a way of supporting this important place into the future , after we are gone .”