The pain and suffering intensified and the
down the back of my neck.
frustration mounted.
My heart thudded in my chest hard and my
“Every time I tell the doctors I have a new
eyes like a well filled up.
symptom they’d put my hand down and say,
‘It’s the lupus, it’s the lupus.” She felt she The Intensive Care Unit?! Oh God! She had
wasn’t being heard so she penned all her been admitted to the hospital before but
symptoms and handed it to the doctor. He never in ICU.
glanced it over and turned it into a paper
boat. A few days later she was released from "I always tell people it’s not how I look, it’s
the hospital. how I feel,” Nazy responded.
She left home again and never came back An infection was to blame, possibly because
the doctors had not adequately treated the
It was a Saturday morning in February 2015. one she had about a week prior. About a week
She had recently been released from the and a half later and now unable to walk, Nazy
hospital after a flare-up. Despite taking her was transferred from the ICU to a
medication it appeared that she wasn’t rehabilitation facility to learn to walk again.
getting better. An ER visit was the next step. In less than a week of being at the rehab, she
But as Nazy tried to get out of bed she was so had to be rushed to the ER.
sick that she could barely stand. We dialed 9-
1-1.
“CHF!CHF!CHF!” My sister who was with her
at the time said they frantically announced on
As the EMT wheeled her away, our precocious the PA system – code for congestive heart
4 year old niece Makaela blurted, “Spoiler failure. While in the ER, staring at us Nazy
alert, spoiler alert! aunty Nazy is not coming whispered, “I’m scared, what can the doctors
back.” We were shocked at her words, do for me?”
however, three weeks later, we find out that
little Makaela was right, she never came With tears in my eyes and hope in my heart, I
home. reassured her that the doctors would do
everything they can to make her well again.
At the ER But…
“This is a very sick girl,” the doctor said as he The last few months of Nazy’s life were
endearingly rubbed her leg. “Her numbers are traumatizing, heartbreaking and nail-bitingly
sicker than she looks. We’ll take her to the brutal. And the last three days, well…
ICU.”
This was disconcerting. As the doctors words
hit my ears, it felt like ice water running
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