Spark [Robert_Klitzman]_When_Doctors_Become_Patients(Boo | Page 141

130 Becoming a Patient be here at 9 A.M . rounds.’’ I said, ‘‘I may not be able to do that. I may be half an hour late.’’ He said, ‘‘I’m really not interested.’’ So I talked to the head of the radiation department, and asked to have radiation at 6 A.M . For my whole four months on that unit, I was never late. That was not discrimination, but very harsh. I wasn’t sure if I should confront him. I decided it wasn’t worth it. But I used to get up at 5 A.M .! As Deborah indicated, addressing this bias can be formidable, and thus is avoided. Colleagues expected each other to perform their full duties. No room was allowed for filling only part of the role. The doctor role was all or nothing. Thus, at times, colleagues treated an ill physician still as a phy- sician, and refused to make any allowances for sickness. These colleagues might have been expected to show compassion, and treat an ill physician as they would any other patient—with empathy and concern. Instead, due to work demands, colleagues could expect ill doctors to maintain com- plete or almost complete responsibilities. Many of these ill doctors experienced subtle and not so subtle forms of peripheralization: being passed over for promotions, or no longer either being asked to be on committees, or getting fellows to assist with re- search or clinical duties. Brian, who had hepatitis, said, ‘‘My illness im- pacted my competition to become director of the clinic. Someone else was chosen.’’ Once they were perceived as sick, these doctors lost status and power. Illness might not impair a physician’s ability to function, but was nevertheless seen as doing so. Ill doctors were perceived as somehow not being full or whole physicians. The implications of these altered views can hurt. In the competitive world of medicine, where trainees must be driven to succeed, ill phy- sicians commonly envied colleagues receiving promotions or extra re- sources. Scott, who had an infected foot, saw newer colleagues receive more patients. I’m jealous: the department got some new hotshot genetics fellow. She’s good, but doesn’t know more than me. But they’re giving her all these cases. Whenever they want to ask a genetics question, they turn to her. I’ve been there for five years! Peripheralization can manifest itself in small, but still disturbing, ways. Bradley, who became depressed after his MI, found that colleagues