British-born . She agreed with my view of the connotations of the St George ’ s flag but also believed the Union Jack has some similar implications too . To me , Britishness is not just a physical object or even a flag , but rather a sense of belonging and identity .
For many years , I ’ ve often struggled with my own racial identity , and my first encounter with race was as a child in primary school . My sister and I were playing in the school playground and were approached by another child , simply asking “ Why are you white and why are you brown ?”, as my sister is darker than me . In retrospect , it ’ s almost endearing but amusing , as children have little to no filter , but I recall being shocked and unsure how to respond . My sister often answered for us both and would reply with “ She ’ s adopted ” and quickly shut down any further conversation . I never really understood the nuances of this , as I was not adopted but it soon became a running joke in my family . As I got older , I was required to fill out a tick box form asking my nationality and ethnicity and would answer ‘ White Asian ’ as this is what I believed was correct . I misunderstood that I was not in fact ‘ White Asian ’ but rather ‘ British Asian ’. I was confused by these labels and would tick ‘ White ’ as I thought that it was part of my identity because that is what the world saw me as . I acknowledge that I benefit from white privilege , as not only does my skin colour shield me from racism but so does my name . Hannah is both a Pakistani and Caucasian name however on forms , such as job applications , there may be a bias towards a candidate ,
ENGL275 such as myself , for having a ‘ white name ’, and therefore being more palatable . These microaggressions anger me as my DNA was merely a potluck and although I benefit from this everyday racism , my family members do not . I am very much aware of the preferential treatment that I often face , not just from English people but in the South Asian community too . Although I feel Britishness is a feeling and it provides a sense of belonging and is part of my identity , I cannot help feeling it produces labels , one of which is race .
I am often met with preferential treatment from other South Asians , due to the deeply ingrained Colourism in our community . Colourism is the “ dislike and unfair treatment of the members of a particular racial group who have a darker skin colour than others ”. It is perpetuated by the media , as most Bollywood films are cast with fair-skinned actors to fit into a western ideal and the consequences of this are devastating . Many South Asians associate fair skin with more opportunity , privilege and even wealth and use dangerous , unregulated skin lightening creams such as ‘ Fair & Lovely ’ to achieve this allegedly ‘ Fair and lovely ’ effect . However , colourism is not only perpetuated by the media but colonialism and capitalism too . The obsession with fairskin and the unattainable Euro-centric ideals has trickled down through British rule in India , which western companies , such as Unilever capitalise on through skinlightening creams . As Brits , we often forget the disastrous effects of colonialism , but it still impacts South Asian culture today .
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