are that matters most. The majority of people we lead will be far more impacted by our character and behavior than by the content of our curriculum.
One of the reasons Jesus so harshly condemned the Pharisees was the toxic and contagious nature of their character.
Many of the things they taught were actually spot on. At one point, Jesus even told his disciples to do what they said to do— but not what they did. 1 A few extra rules never killed anybody, but a harsh, judgmental, arrogant, and merciless character is a deadly spiritual cancer that spreads quickly.
SMALL THINGS MATTER
The key question every leader has to ask isn’ t, am I leading by example? It’ s, what kind of example am I setting? Most of us evaluate the example we’ re setting by the general pattern of our lives. We look at the big picture. But those who are watching us daily don’ t pay attention to the big picture as much as the exceptions. We tend to judge ourselves by our best moments. They tend to judge us by our worst moments.
If you’ re generally a laid-back, easygoing, let-it-slide leader, you’ ll probably see yourself as not easily angered. You’ ll think you’ re setting a stellar example of patience, turning the other cheek, bearing with others, and not taking offense. But all it takes is one road-rage incident while I’ m in your car, and I’ ll never forget it. It’ s the same with issues of honesty and integrity. Small things matter. For instance, we expect smart people to occasionally do dumb things. But we expect honest people to always be honest. One lie and the honest label is gone for good. That’ s why halftruths, disingenuous public praise, and euphemisms used to obscure uncomfortable facts have a far more negative impact than most of us realize. They erode trust, create cynicism, and model deceit in ways most of us miss.
THERE ARE NO SECRETS
As spiritual leaders we also need to understand that there are no secrets. If every follower is a boss watcher, a corollary is that they’ re well aware of lots of things we don’ t think they can see. The things we think no one knows about are often widely known and discussed in hushed tones when we’ re not around. And the things we think we’ ve hidden well inevitably come to light when we least expect it.
Whether it’ s our congregation, staff
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