and action due to strong Rose Bush
traits in his temperament, lost respect
for his father and took matters into
his own hands. He had Amnon killed
(2 Samuel 13). David still didn’t act,
but did refuse to welcome Absalom
back into the palace for several years.
Let’s call it one of the longest time-
outs ever given to a misbehaving son.
When his father finally forgave him,
it did not restore their relationship
at all. It was too late. Absalom was
already planning his coup. Parents
raising Rose Bushes are likely to see
the exact same response in their kids
as David saw in Absalom: if you don’t
lead decisively, they take over; if you
ignore them, they take revenge.
teen son is a double introverted, 50/50
Boxwood-Pine combination, and our
youngest daughter is a power-house of
equal parts Palm, Rose and Boxwood
Tree. My conclusions during and after
many frustrating and hurtful clashes
are that family is meant to be the first
jungle we navigate. By learning our
way through the jungle at home, we are
better able to navigate other relational
jungles. Some apples are meant to fall
elsewhere, and each tree spreads its
own shade.
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Our home is a jungle of diverse tree
types too. I am a task-oriented Boxwood
Tree and Rose Bush combination, with
a dash of the talkative Palm thrown
in while my husband is an easy-going
Pine-Palm with a pinch of Rose Bush
that comes out only in his work life.
Our oldest daughter is 90% peaceful
Pine Tree with one socialite Palm Tree
frond that pops out occasionally. Our
Hettie Brittz
Hettie Brittz is a wife, mother, speaker, author, and a foremost
voice in parenting advice and personality styles from South
Africa, now living in the US. A former speech, hearing, and
language pathologist, Brittz developed the Evergreen
Parenting Course and codeveloped the Tall Trees Profiles. Her
latest book is Growing Kids with Character.
14 • Solutions