YOUR CHILDREN
ARE NOT MINIATURE
VERSIONS OF YOU
By Hettie Brittz
We’ve all seen parents trying to live
vicariously through the lives of their
children. A mom living her violinist
dream through her daughter who
would much rather be an engineer, or
a dad pushing his son on the football
field when the young boy would rather
be a singer. It’s hard for us to see when
we want our kids to be just like us or
want the things we want. It is subtle.
We don’t mean to turn our kids into
someone they are not, but I have yet
to meet a parent who hasn’t struggled
just a bit with the apple that fell so
far from the tree that it landed in a
different zip code.
Perhaps we are acutely aware of
the truth that God chose us for
our kids and our kids for us – very
intentionally and wisely. However, we
neglect the equally important truth
that He intends to shape us just as
much as He intends for us to shape
our children! This shaping happens
in the uncomfortable places where
wills clash and personality differences
cause friction. The characteristics we
prefer are challenged by the kids that
don’t have them and the ungodly traits
in us are brought to the surface when
our kids have the gift of putting their
sticky little fingers exactly where our
triggers are!
Thinking back, most of us will recall
how it felt when our very identity or the
core of our personality was dismissed
Solutions • 11