Silver and Gold Magazine Spring 2020 | Page 20

NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY T hey recommend to eat an apple a day for iron, and a banana for potassium. Also an orange, for Vitamin C, half a melon to improve digestion, and a cup of green tea without sugar to prevent Diabetes. Don’t forget the 2 litres of water you must drink per day. Every day we must also eat the “L. Cassei Defensis” packed Yogurt, although nobody really knows what that is, but it seems as if not taking a million-and-a-half of these enzymes per day you’ll begin to see blurry…? Take an Aspirin per day to prevent heart attacks, plus a glass of wine which is said to do the same. Another of white wine to support the nervous system. Then a glass of beer, what was that for again? Maybe if you drink them all together it won’t matter what they were for as you’d be feeling great anyway! Let’s not forget our friends! We have to look after them like a favourite plant, watching over them daily. We also need to be well informed, so don’t forget to read at least one newsmagazine or paper per day. Oh yes! And let’s not forget about “personal time with the spouse” – without falling into routine. We must be innovative, creative, and renew the art of seduction. That takes time too! Anyway, so far I calculated about 29 hours per day. Oh yes! Don’t forget to brush your teeth well after every meal – so after the Yogurt, the apple, the banana… Maybe it’s best to install a nice sound system in the bathroom, because between the food, brushing, water and fibre you’re probably going to be there a long time every day. The only remedy I see is to do many of these things at once: Shower with cold water, keeping mouth open in order to swallow 2 litres of water. While you’re in the bathroom, toothbrush at hand, spend some “personal time” with your mate, while they watch TV and update you on the latest news. Then, while you vacuum your home, call your friends, and your parents too. Drink the red and white wines (after speaking with your parents you will probably need it) – and good thing you’re not a child otherwise you’d have to drink milk along with this to get enough calcium in your daily diet! Sleep 8 hours per day, and work another 8 hours. Plus the 5 that you’re spending chewing your food, there’s 21. You have 3 hours left, as long as you don’t have any unexpected things happen… According to statistics, we watch 3 hours of television per day… Well you can’t now, because you have to still walk at least 1/2 hour per day! Wow! You still have 2 minutes left over! So maybe copy this article and send it to your friends, who you have to look after like dear plants. And between the yogurt, melon, beer, water, and third meal of the day with fibre, I don’t know about you but I sure need a bathroom urgently! Maybe I’ll take my toothbrush with me while I’m at it… • Eat your fibre. Lots and lots of fibre. And ingest between four and six meals per day, light meals, without forgetting to chew one hundred times before you swallow! This should only take you about five hours of your day… If you’re going to bake with butter, it’s fine to leave it on the counter for a few hours; if you’re going to leave it out for longer than that, be sure it’s 20 Read + hear more: www.silvergoldmagazine.ca salted butter. The salt in the butter works as a bit of preservative, protecting against some bacterial growth. If you’re unsure whether your butter is still good to eat, give it a sniff… rancid butter will definitely smell ‘off’ and taste sour! If you’re looking for a healthy ‘butter’ you can leave out of the fridge, try making Ghee! Ghee is a clarified butter that has had its milk solids strained out. It’s easy to make, see our recipe online! www.silvergoldmagazine.ca Is your refrigerated butter too hard to spread? Grate it, or use a cheese slicer.