Melia Flowers: Tell me, how did you meet your husband and how did you know that
he was “the one”?
Mary Alice Monroe: It was love at first sight. I was assistant to the General Editor of the
Encyclopedia Britannica (my generation’s Google) and was invited to a fondue party by
a fellow writer. It was a frigid night in Chicago. I walked into the small apartment and
soon spotted a young man with long, dark hair and dark eyes - he looked like young
Johnny Depp. We saw each other and I thought, “Oh no, I’m not ready for this.” Markus
came to talk to me and we were together ever since.
MF: Wow! Love at first sight! Honestly, I would have been disappointed by any answer
other than that one, coming from you! After all, you are Mary Alice Monroe, weaver of
the sweetest love stories ever - in my humble opinion. I remember you telling me in
our last conversation that your husband had a hand in inspiring you to write after you
were confined to bed during one of your pregnancies. What has his support meant to
you over the years?
MAM: Yes. For my third pregnancy, I was put to bed in July for an October baby. I was
feeling sorry for myself… trapped. I had two other children and felt I’d lost control over
my home. My husband (a psychiatrist) took the TV out of my bedroom, handed me a
yellow legal pad and a pen and said, “For as long as I’ve known you, [you’ve] wanted
time to write a novel. Now, you have that time.” I wrote my first novel, The Long Road
Home. I like to say I gave birth to a baby and a book. That book was later published
and my life changed. I also learned a valuable life lesson: sometimes what you think is
an obstacle can be an opportunity.
MF: As are most of us, the characters in your books are often wounded, and they struggle with the concept of accepting the love of a worthy man. Yet, love always rises to the
occasion, healing even the most brok en of hearts. I’m wondering…do you personally
feel that love conquers all?
MAM: I like what you said better, “Love rises to the occasion.” Love of a partner, a
mother, a father, a sister, a friend - all of these intimate relationships are vital to our
well-being. We need them. At the end of my novels, the heroine may not stay with the
hero at that moment in time, but I like to believe that she has learned enough through
her love relationships that no matter what her decision down the road, we trust she
will be strong, empowered, and content. Thus, I believe in life, it’s not so much “love
conquers all” as much as love gives you the strength to endure and persevere.
MF: To what degree would you say that your own love story has inspired your writing
of the many romantic relationships you have brought to life?
MAM: I suppose elements of Markus are in all my heroes - nobility, honesty, strength
of character. Our long marriage contributes to my belief in the institution of marriage,
the joy of children, and the confidence that good times and bad are all part of it. We
have always had a fundamental respect for one another that I believe is essential for
not only the way we are able to communicate with each other, but also for the way we
form a united front to the public and, especially, the kids. Also, in The Summer Girls,
Harper falls in love with Taylor at first sight. I know that happens! Finally, romance is
important in a marriage. Remember you are lovers, not roommates.
MF: What have you learned about love and marriage that you tend to bring into play
when developing your stories?
MAM: Lust is easy. Falling in love is fun. Marriage - commitment - is hard work. All relationships require a mindfulness of the other person. Taking the long view is important,
but so is taking a few minutes each day to make your husband or wife happy. I try to
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have my characters do the things Markus and I do. For me, I try telling him he looks
good in that shirt, he smells good, or I walk up and slip my arms around him to say
“good morning” rather than just mumble it. For guys, have date nights! Give flowers!
It’s such an easy thing to pick up as a surprise that means so much. Pour a glass of
wine! The little things can create romance more than a grand gesture could.
I read once, “If you want to be happy, do something to make someone else happy.”
I swear that is true. Take it a step further for romance.
MF: Likewise, do you feel that your writing about relationships and all of the complexities of them lead you to consider situations and nuances of love and marriage in a way
that you may not have otherwise? Has that been a plus in your marriage?
MAM: No, just the opposite. While my marriage can give me positive ideas and energy
for my stories, in my novels my heroines have difficulties and problems and they are
angry. Not a good feeling when I turn off the computer at night!
MF: What is the best advice you have for women concerning love and marriage?
MAM: When getting married, you have to be committed for the long haul. No “if it
doesn’t work out…” mentality. Only through working out the problems, opening up
communication, keeping faith, and doing the work can you endure the rough patches. Even during days when I wanted to walk away, I have found that sticking with it
has brought me to the truly sweetest part of marriage - the later years when we share
memories, grandchildren, and the satisfaction and contentment of being each other’s
best friend.
MF: Do you have a favorite romantic read?
MAM: A classic - Pride and Prejudice. Yes, I love Mr. Darcy!
MF: Ahhhhh, yes. Mr. Darcy! From your own work, do you have a favorite couple?
MAM: I have to say the love story of Lovie and Russell in Beach House Memories (the
sequel to The Beach House) is the most romantic that I’d written, even though it was
ill-fated. She had faith and utter sureness of the profound love she shared, even for so
short a time, which helped her endure a lifetime of romance at its best.
The sexiest love story was clearly Girl in the Mirror’s Charlotte and Michael (Miguel).
Lord, that was a love story I enjoyed writing – and dreaming about!
MF: Oh my! I could not agree with you more! Lovie and Russell were just the most precious couple ever. In fact, I almost went through a full box of tissues over them! About
your latest work- what did you enjoy most about writing A Lowcountry Wedding? Can
you share with fans of the series without giving anything away?
MAM: I’ve been the mother of a lowcountry bride. In this book, I could share those important words I’d share with my daughter - the advice and caveats. Mamaw spoke
words I would share with my own brides.
Also, creating the Lowcountry Wedding Giveaway! I am so amazed at the incredible
wedding package we have created for one lucky bride. Starting in March, we are giving
away a FREE lowcountry wedding at the Legare Waring House plantation for up to fifty
guests! A dream wedding in Charleston! Beginning March 1st on my website (www.
maryalicemonroe.com) and on my author page on Facebook, the details of the wedding will be released.
MF: Thank you so much, Mary Alice! Thank you for sharing your own personal thoughts
on love and marriage for this issue. You are a delight! I cannot wait for the next book
and the opportunity to talk to you again!
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