SHARE Magazine January 2015 | Page 20

DVD I vocalized my views angrily and the people listened to me. A man called Graham prayed for me saying he felt God was saying He cared for me and was going to bring me back to Him. I missed God so much but felt my life was in too much of a mess for God to want me back at all. Graham became my friend and he didn’t mind when I said things out of order which I did a lot when I was stressed, angry or annoyed. He listened and did not judge me. He stayed my friend when other people would have walked away thinking, I will pray for her but I’m not getting too involved. Graham showed me patience and kindness I had forgotten was there in Christians. I continued to drink alcohol and smoke cigarettes and go clubbing on Dad’s weekends but never touched ‘Poppers’ again. After a couple of sessions I stopped Divorce Care because it did my head in. Through the sessions however, I found out about DC4K which is a course especially for children to help them understand divorce. I just wanted to forget and not deal with it. But despite all this God did not give up on me and I started Divorce Care in February 2014 every Saturday morning. Every week it all made more sense and I would read the book and answer what questions I could as I still did not believe in all the Bible and God stuff. One day I questioned the Bible and how it didn’t make sense to me and the leader Barbara said, “The Bible would make sense to anyone who is a true Christian.” Another time Barbara spoke about her marriage breakdown and how she turned to Jesus straight away. I questioned why I didn’t do that. Barbara was very passionate about people really KNOWING JESUS and how GOD was in the HEART business. That God wants to know your heart. I thought He will not want to know mine anymore its broken and ruined. I kept being prayed for about things and they really cared about the fact my marriage had been awful and especially how hurt my children and I were. I was shown this wasn’t God’s plan for my encouraged to read it. It made me realize my error and that ‘God has a wonderful plan for my life!’ As I read it God showed me I was a ‘False Convert’ and showed me how back in February 2006 I hadn’t truly turned my life away from sin. I had carried on breaking all His commandments and I was a sinner and I was condemned to Hell. The good news was I was still alive! I struggled to accept that I had been a false convert and felt embarrassed to talk to my new friends so I messaged the man who runs Living Waters. He was wonderful and helped me to understand what was happening to me. Then on 2nd May 2014 at 23:54 I fully repented, \