[ Re ] Balancing Life after Baby
By Lauren Belous , DMD
When my now-husband , Brad , and I first met at Tufts University School of Dental Medicine ( TUSDM ), our day-to-day lives and career aspirations were so closely aligned that an outsider couldn ’ t tell them apart . We collaborated : sharing notes and creating study guides with our shared goals in sight . We enjoyed this care-free period of studying hard , fostering our relationship and spending free time with classmates . Upon graduation , Brad moved to Philadelphia to attend Thomas Jefferson ’ s OMFS program , and I remained at TUSDM for Endodontics residency . Our years as residents were hectic , fun and challenging in ways we had not previously experienced . After having spent four intensely symmetric years together in Boston , we both became independent dental professionals balancing residency schedules with a long-distance engagement . After two years apart , one destination wedding , and several thousand frequent flier miles , I graduated and moved to Philadelphia to join Brad .
In Center City Philly , I started practicing endodontics while Brad waded through months of sleepless nights in resident on-call rooms and grueling hospital rotations . To call these first years of marriage a “ honeymoon phase ” would be inaccurate . The lack of physical ( let alone emotional ) time spent together was a major relationship stressor , my first year of private practice was uninspiring , and in the spring of Brad ’ s chief year , COVID hit ! One big positive to COVID was that we had some down time to discuss our what it would look like if we started a family in addition to pursuing full time specialty associateships and / or partnerships . While these conversations are obviously unique to each individual or family , we personally realized it was healthiest for us to consider career advances asynchronously . Thus , when the one partner felt it was necessary or appropriate to seek an alteration or advancement in his or her career , the other partner needed to be comfortable and stable , and feel able to support the partner experiencing change . We also used a similar consideration when making personal decisions . In March of 2022 , we became parents to our daughter , Emilia , and she has enriched our lives immeasurably .
22 SEPTEMBER / OCTOBER 2023 | PENNSYLVANIA DENTAL JOURNAL