Studies have focused on similar question in between family members. For example
the literature “The Influence of the Family Environment on Personality: Accounting for
Sibling Differences”, a phycology-based scholar article by Lois Wladis Hoffman, offering
different family environment variables which could cause influence; and a current news “4
Simple Texts That Can Boost Your Bond with Your Teen” written by Erin Leyba LCSW,
Ph.D., addressing ways to communicate effectively with your children.
My mother will ask me to share or just simply give away the brand-new highlight-
er with sparkles on the body and a unicorn on the top with my sister when she is rolling on
the ground crying for what is in your hand. However, as the older ones in this family, I
laughed in my bedroom with cunning faces when I heard my mom accomplishing me,
comparing me with my sister. I totally ignore her words when she is sobbing and trying to
justify herself in front of mom. The conversation always ends with my sister slapping her
door crying “she’s the best! So, what’s the purpose of having me!?” When you have
siblings in your family, let’s be honest, it impossible to gain equal attention or love from
your parents. What’s mentioned in Lois Wladis Hoffman’s paper supports this common
knowledge. He states that “Firstborn children are treated differently by parents throughout
life than are subsequent children” (Cushna, 1966; Hilton, 1967; Rothbart, 1971). The
distinct differences are between “firstborn” and “subsequent”, which means that there
might be less, or none differences within subsequent children but a strong distinguish
when comparing to the firstborn.
Referring to Bender’s novel, this distinction appears in different analogies given by
Lane, one of the two parents. She said to Rose that her brother Joseph “is like a
geode——plain on the outside, gorgeous on the inside” (Bender 45). When I think of this
sentence, I have picture of a geode in my mind, with all colors of lights reflecting within,
and how it looks so common in the outside, which impressed you even more Rose defiant-
ly knows it is a praise towards Joseph, and she realized how her brother “soaked up most
of her super attention, which on occasion made me feel like I was drowning in light”
(Bender 45). Rose is still keen on knowing what is she like in her mother’s mind. Her
mother told her that she was like seaglass, which represents a pretty love gainer. There
exists so many things that carries the feature of beauty, and when something possess
pretty, in some ways, it is easier to gain superficial love. It is not specific, not convincing,
and unimaginable. It is a word too vague to show your sincere or to express your love to