Risk & Business Magazine Gifford Associates Fall 2016 | Page 15

RELATIONSHIPS FUNDAMENTALS I’ve hung out with someone in fifteen years.” This is more the norm than you might imagine. A lot of people go out and build big companies and have all kinds of fame, but they feel empty. Janis Joplin said, “On stage, I make love to twenty-five thousand different people. Then I go home alone.” Focusing on the key relationships in your life isn’t just a smart way to identify where to invest your focus and energy—it’s also human. It deepens connections. It creates meaning in our lives. One thing I often tell people is that you’re either in communication with someone or you’re trying to escape. When we talk to people, we go in and out of different thoughts. We think about our kids. We think about what we have to do that day. We think about going to the bathroom. When you’re communicating with someone while simultaneously trying to escape, it could be that you’re not aligned with that person …OR… you may not be aligned with yourself. I grew up shy, introverted, and scared. I used to get high, practically daily, in high school, and I was a terrible drug addict because I didn’t know how to interact with other humans. In retrospect, it’s kind of funny that I built one of the highest-level relationship networks in the world for successful entrepreneurs (called Genius Network), because social skills did not come to me naturally. It was survival. I was either going to hate life, or I was going to figure out how to interact with other humans. SO, WHAT CAN YOU DO WITH ALL THIS? Marie Kondo, the author of The Life- BY: JOE POLISH FOUNDER & CREATOR, GENIUSNETWORK.COM Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing says, “The best way to choose what to keep and what to throw away is to take each item in one’s hand and ask: ‘Does this spark joy?’ If it does, keep it. If not, dispose of it.” You can apply this to people too. Does this person spark joy? If they don’t, do everything you can to minimize interactions with that person and cultivate more meaningful relationships with the people that spark joy for you. The number one aspect of your life that you must protect is your attention. Yet, what consumes most people’s attention is noise. A lot of entrepreneurs spend their time with clients that are angry, complainers, or needy. Every person owns a piece of your attention. Your progress in life is dependent on how good you are at protecting that attention. It’s like the old saying, “The squeaky wheel gets the oil.” However, my good friend Peter Diamandis has a better way of thinking about it: “The squeaky wheel gets replaced.” SUPPLEMENT CONTENT THE IDEAL TEAM PLAYER: How to Recognize and Cultivate The Three Essential Virtuesships by: Patrick Lencioni The Ideal Team Player, Lencioni tells the story of Jeff Shanley, a leader desperate to save his uncle’s company by restoring its cultural commitment to teamwork. Jeff must crack the code on the virtues that real team players possess, and then build a culture of hiring and development around those virtues. Beyond the fable, Lencioni presents a practical framework and actionable tools for identifying, hiring, and developing ideal team players. Not all your relationships are equal. What are the relationships in your life that need to be replaced? Make a list. Get clear. Free yourself. What are your most important relationships? Cultivate them. Deepen them. Make them a priority in your life. + Joe Polish is the founder and creator of GeniusNetwork.com, one of the highestlevel relationship networks for successful entrepreneurs, and co-founder of 10xTalk and I Love Marketing, two highly popular podcasts on iTunes. TOPGRADING: The Proven Hiring and Promoting Method That Turbocharges Company Performance by: Dr. Brad Smart Three huge problems account for the typical poor results in hiring: dishonesty (via deceptive résumés), incomplete information (via shallow interviews), and lack of verifiability (via biased references). Topgrading shows how to solve all three problems. Instead of hir­ing by your gut reactions to résumés and interviews, you can start using a scientifically honed process that compels candidates to be totally honest. The Topgrading system makes hiring easier, faster, and more successful than any other process. FALL 2016 | 15