Reloaded Mag Africa Volume 21 | Page 6

ALMOST 30 - A SINGLE GIRL IN 'JOZI'

As we already know, the Almost 30 journey was embarked on last month and so far… let’s just say it's ‘going’.

It’s August, Women’s Month, and it wouldn’t make any sense if we didn’t address the matter that has been debated over and over, in different languages, throughout different cultures and time zones…basically just talked to death and here I am, bringing it back to life as it applies to me. Now, before we go anywhere, just note that my opinions are my own and you are as always, welcome to your own.

We live in an era where women have the right to vote, become world leaders, business owners and basically just ‘slay’ and be a boss wherever she likes. I for one love my independence and there is nothing I find more inspiring than seeing a woman working, making her own money, living in a house she owns, driving a car she pays for with a ‘hella’ expensive weave she bought – I just look at her and think “YUUUSSS HUNNI, DO THE DAMN THING”. And logically, I assume any sane man can appreciate that as well.

And with that said, the argument begins… Because she has her life together, when she is being courted (this means dating young folk) by a man, or even married – why then does it seem that there is huge surge of confusion among the heterosexual male species, being that they seem to think that somehow, women having these liberties, allows them to neglect their core manly instincts and just carry on like wild children. Single men, these days have lost their sense of purpose in a woman’s life is… It’s easy to say ‘oh well hun, we both work so let’s go 50/50 on the bill’ and ‘well I don’t have to pick you up because for dates because you drive too’… But let me break it down for you, from ‘Singledom Chair’, just how ridiculous that is.

carry on like wild children. Single men, these days have lost their sense of purpose in a woman’s life… It’s easy to say ‘oh well hun, we both work so let’s go 50/50 on the bill’ and ‘well I don’t have to pick you up before for dates because you drive too’… But let me break it down for you, from ‘Singledom Chair’, just how ridiculous that is.

The minute you decide to pursue a woman (assuming you are a coherent person, with the end goal of making that woman your wife). You ask her out for dinners and lunches and work functions and whatever else you need a companion for. Let me ask you this: Where do you think she the fuel her car uses to meet you all over the city comes from? Where do you think the clothes she looks so amazing in come from? Where on this planet do you think her nice perfume and good hair comes from???

It’s easy to ‘look’ for a partner – it’s harder to know that with all these new age independence talks, your role as a man in her life will never change. Why does it not make sense that your woman – married or not – looks good, has fuel in her car, has money to keep her hair looking great and is just generally well kept? When did it become so wrong for men to “hunt and gather” for the ones they love and care about…the ones they want in their space? All modern notions aside, that I s what you are meant for. You are a provider, a protector, the leader of the family – how are you leading me when you have no clue where you are going and what you will be doing when you get there? Why is it that in me requiring you to stick to your core nature, I am suddenly labeled ‘money hungry’ or “gold digger’? If you as my man are not making sure I am okay – who must do it?