Being amongst those of the ‘popular’ nature, I never
really gained the chance to express myself, and thinking
about it now, that never really hit home, I felt
comfortable and honored to have a big group of friends,
and I definitely wasn’t prepared to do anything that
could potentially compromise that. I had always wondered
what it would be like to explore different things, and
meet new people, I remember always taking time out
from the group to look around and see how other
people’s personalities were shaping. I found it rather
intriguing how different people outside my ‘friendship’
group carried themselves; I enjoyed looking for new
fashion senses and interesting personalities.
Back in school there was a girl in my form; she was
around 6ft 2 and spent quite a lot of the time by
herself, she was rather mysterious and seemed to
really enjoy her own company. The long, black ankle coat
with fur around the hood always caught my eye; it was
always layered with an under-jacket, and our standard
school uniform underneath. The coat reminded me of
something from ‘the men in black’ it was so dark and
mysterious, and I could never take my eyes off of it!
There I was in my standard ‘Nike’ windbreaker that all
my friends had, admiring her clothing from a distance,
wishing that I one day would have the courage that she
has.
It became more spectacular when those dreaded ‘non
school uniform’ days arrived; she entered the school with
more courage regarding her sense of style than I ever
thought was possible.
Although I was taken back by her style, and although I
was forever wishing I had the courage to be individual
with the way I dressed, I was forever frightened of
moving away from the norm of ‘fitting in’. This girl was in
a world of her own, she almost gave off the impression
that she didn’t care about what other people thought and
their opinions on her, and the way she dressed.
There were always people around her that would send
her funny looks, or would make snide comments whenever
she walked past, and the majority of these people were
a part of the friendship group I found myself ‘stuck’
in. I remember thinking to myself “how can people be so
cruel”, I never really did understand why everyone felt
comfortable following others rather than being their own
person, like she was. It genuinely did hurt to see people
attempt to make this girl feel so small and irrelevant.
Looking back now, 8 years on, I have came to the
realization that everybody is their own person, you should
be comfortable in your own skin, and not afraid to
express yourself. It’s not all about ‘fitting in’ and
conforming to what’s real at that particular time, it’s
about finding yourself, and following what you believe in.