founder’ s note
Mom’ s Waiting...
I
used to think my limitations could only be unlocked when I became worthy. That there was some status, some position that I’ d one day attain, when I had developed enough skills, the right contacts, the proper look, confidence, and had gotten permission.
I put many of my ideas, my thoughts, my dreams on hold, but articulated them neatly in a journal of things I wrote but never thought I’ d actually attempt and tucked them neatly in my drawer. I made sure to never add dates or names, and wrote in crypted code because even in my private moments, my most intimate thoughts, in my being, I didn’ t want to be exposed as a failure or reminded of what I didn’ t achieve.
I didn’ t cry for years, like 10. I thought this made me strong. I hid behind a proper, perfect mask. I hid everything I actually wanted.
Coloring well within the lines, I keep my dreams, my goals quiet, attainable, non-ambitious, comfortable to my friends, my family, to myself. I never expanded, walked on the edge or even looked at the edge.
8 POWERCULTURE APR2013