george
Bailey:
Listen, mister, you seem to know an awful
lot about my life. Enough to know that. And,
well, I don’t wanna be rude, but, let me just
ask you this: did that particular Christmas
Eve of mine LOOK LIKE FUN TO YOU?!
Crumpet:
Fair point. But what is fun for you? What,
say, are some of your favorite holiday movies?
And do not – do not! – say It’s a Wonderful
Life.
george
Bailey:
Ernest Saves Christmas. And Santa with
Muscles (starring none other than Hulk
Hogan). And It’s a Wonderful Life!
Crumpet:
Santa with Muscles was also the feature debut
of Mila Kunis. Wildly underrated. Screening
at my place after we spend some sweet holiday time with America’s favorite non-couple,
Charlie Brown and Lucy Van Pelt! Charlie, I
have to start out with something I’d always
wanted to know – what is Snoopy really like?
luCy:
A queen never has to belittle herself by orchestrating others’ failures. Charlie Brown
can do that without my help. He excels at
failure. In fact, I would say he is the poster
child for failure. Please don’t misunderstand.
I like Charlie Brown. It is good to have friends
that make you look good when you stand next
to them. And I looked so good at the Christmas play!
Crumpet:
And how did the play go, Charlie? Your special ends before we have a chance to see the
performance.
Charlie:
It was pretty good. My mom liked it …
luCy:
He’s a great dog, my best friend. But maybe
that’s because I’m the one who feeds him.
[Interrupts] There was lots of applause.
Mostly for me. Linus was pretty good too and
afterward our parents took us to get double
scoops of ice cream on waffle cones ... and the
two flavors I got were chocolate cherry bliss
and spumoni. Two kinds of ice cream ... that
is happiness!
Crumpet:
Lucy, are you still in search of real estate?
Crumpet:
Just as I imagined, that is great to –
luCy:
luCy:
He is a DOG!! Good grief ... what do you
think he is like? He is lazy and smelly and
licks peoples’ faces with his di