Pink Weddings Magazine PinkWeddings AW2017_V2 - Page 78

Ask FondA Our agony aunt Fonda Cox tackles the dilemmas that are keeping you awake at night… Ask DEAR FONDA, we'd like a naturist wedding. How far should we go with accessories? My dear reader, when one thinks of a naturist wedding, there’s so many things to consider. Firstly, I hope you are of a sprightly young age – there’d be nothing worse than a bridesmaid tripping over the groom’s scrotum as it scrapes the floor behind him. And god forbid you should drop the rings and have to bend down to retrieve them… you don’t want to show the world the ring he’s truly marrying you for. As a drag queen I think it’s essential to accessorise in some way, and what would a wedding be without a fascinator? The great thing about being naturists is that the fascinator instantly becomes a versatile accessory, and from what I remember of those educational movies of the ’70s shot on volley ball courts of nudist camps, most of them appeared to have Diana Ross or Mick Hucknall rammed feet first up their jacksie! So pick a nice bright one and wear it with care – I’d hate the wedding picture to look like a flock of crows were feeding in your lady garden. DEAR FONDA , I was delighted when my fiancée proposed but the ring is, quite frankly, horrible. The problem is, she designed it herself. What should I do? Oh my poor little lamb – I feel your pain. Why, I myself have been saddled with a partner with a less than attractive ring before. In my case I sent 78 » pink weddings magazine