our opinions: CURMUDGEON MUSINGS
The Last
BY MARK BROWN
Word
Let’s Talk About An American Institution
S
128
ometimes I run across things that just bear talking
about. This is the case with a trip my wife and I just
took. Entertainment is fascinating to me, people seem to
do anything, suffer anything, spend anything, if they think
they will be entertained.
So let me describe something and see if you all can
guess what it is.
Crowded to the extent you really can’t move. So
expensive to go there, most people mortgage their lives
to do it, in fact you could probably take a family of four
to Europe cheaper.
Most likely parts of it will be closed when you get
there (rarely do they close Europe unless there is a terror-
ist attack.)
And ultimately what you find when you get there is
it’s really just a giant gift shop.
So if you haven’t guessed yet, I’m talking about
Disney World. The land of Mickey Mouse. The land of
little hats with big ears on top, that most of you read-
ing this have a closet full of, and rarely ever put on. The
land of buying stuff. There is literally a place to buy stuff
everywhere you turn.
They have become the best marketers in the world in
my opinion. People are drawn to this place both young,
medium, and old. And hey, thats great if that is your
thing. Having just been there though I had to talk about
it.
First of all, Disney in the United States of America,
is located in two places. First in Southern California, the
land of traffic, and second in Florida, the land of the
tolls. And if you’ve never driven through
Florida, you’re in for a treat. There are tolls to pay
about every five miles. I don’t know how they look at
themselves in the mirror.
So now don’t get me wrong, I grew up going to
Disneyland, took my kids to both California and Florida
and enjoyed it. I know that sounds like I’m erasing all
that I just wrote, but here is the deal.
Things have changed since we used to go. The money
it takes to just buy tickets and stay in hotels and eat is
incredible. And if you stay in a Disney property hotel,
well just be prepared to get nauseated. Not to mention
airfare if you have to fly the family, then there’s transpor-
tation and then there’s gifts.
Wow, hats t-shirts, if you go to EPCOT which by the
way stands for, Experimental Prototype Community of
Tomorrow, you must buy from each country.
So ultimately Disney is a gift shop, with a few really
good attractions, which unfortunately you must plan
like the Normandy invasion to actually get on the ride.
When we went recently, the newer attractions sold out
completely — in like 10 minutes. People were up at
daybreak to try to get a spot.
Now you also deal with mobile apps, all kinds of
technolog,y which like all technology, doesn’t alway
work. We wanted to go down to breakfast with a couple
of friends one morning early at the Disney hotel, and
when we get there, we find out you had to have reserva-
tions, which no one new about. Is was so crowded that
day, the staff was discombobulated.
So to wrap up …
Walt Disney had a great vision, has given millions
great joy, happiness and fun, and an atmosphere that
can’t be matched. But having said that, it’s a different
world now than when Walt Disney started, so maniacal,
so over-marketed, run by new MBA’s coming out and
working to cut all customer service in order to make
their quarterly books look better. All on the backs of the
consumers. Examples:
• Home Depot — no cashiers anymore, mainly self
checkout
• American Airlines — charging you for everything,
luggage, horrible sandwich lunches, and the worst is,
taking all the room out of coach travel, so bad you can
hardly breathe.
• AT&T — worst customer service in the world, just
an awful company.
Just to name a few...
But all I can say is, whatever your choose to do,
remember it ain’t what it used to be.