So how can we teach our kids to
have a growth mindset? Research
shows that children at any level
can be taught to adopt a growth
mindset. Specifically, parents should
emphasize the effort and strategies
their child uses to achieve a desired
outcome rather than focus on the
child’s intelligence or talent.
This emphasis on process gives the
child a sense of control, in that
she sees that good results often
come from increased effort and
not necessarily innate ability. This
sense of control boosts the child’s
confidence to keep working at a
problem with the understanding
that, if one way of solving the
problem didn’t work, then tackling
the problem in a different way
might.
While encouraging your child
to value the process of learning
rather than just the outcome itself,
Dweck cautions parents to use
praise effectively. Parents should
be mindful to use words that praise
a child’s efforts in accomplishing a
desired result (“You studied hard and
did great!”) versus words that praise
the child’s intelligence (“You got an
A because you’re so smart!”).
2. Make learning fun
To help foster motivated learning,
parents can turn lessons into fun
activities. Add excitement to your
child’s learning experience by
encouraging him to explore his
interests. If your child is interested
in music, sign him up to play a
musical instrument of his choosing
or take him to children’s concerts,
many of which are free at parks and
community centers.
Music in particular is a great teaching
tool because it stirs enthusiasm while
sharpening the child’s understanding
of mathematics, which has a strong
connection to music, according to
the American Mathematical Society.
Musical concepts such as rhythm,
scales, intervals, harmonies, and
pitch are all rooted in math.
If your child is interested in history or
dinosaurs, take her to a museum or
head to your local library to peruse
books on the subject. For a younger
learner, use puzzles and board
games to make mastering concepts
connected to her interests colorful
and fun.
To have fun with learning, use
external rewards, such as stickers,
candy, and money sparingly. The
overuse of external rewards can
undercut motivation over time
by implying to the child that he
can choose to do the task only if
he wants the reward, not for the
inherent value in learning something
new.
3. Respect frustrations and need
for downtime
It’s unreasonable to expect children
to be motivated all the time. When
parents don’t acknowledge a child’s
frustration with learning a particular
skill, children are more likely to
disengage from the learning process.
But exploring your child’s hesitation
to do a task can give her the
reassurance she needs to keep
striving. If you aren’t making
progress in talking to your child
about her frustrations, seek out
a teacher or coach who may have
better success.
Likewise, be respectful of your
child’s need for downtime. While
parents want to give their children
every opportunity to learn, this
well-intentioned goal has to be
balanced with the equally-important
goal of letting a child enjoy being
a kid, notes child psychiatrist Alvin
Rosenfeld, co-author of “The
Overscheduled Child”.
Allowing children to have
unstructured downtime to play
outdoors or simply hang around
the house lets them recharge and
process what they learned during
the structured part of their day. This
boosts creativity as children dream
up ways to fill their time and builds
character as they play with – and
resolve conflicts with – other children
their own age.
4. Allow your children to fail
not to become discouraged when
faced with difficult tasks is to let
them fail and learn how to bounce
back from that failure. Letting
children fail teaches them resilience
and how to take responsibility for
the natural consequences of their
actions.
With that goal in mind, a child is
better served when parents resist
the urge to rescue him from failure
if the source of the failure is the
child’s own lack of effort. When a
child experiences how poor effort
can lead to a poor result, the child
is incentivized to refocus his efforts
at succeeding. This redirection can
bolster the child’s perseverance, self-
reliance, and motivation.
In some children, the fear of failure
can be especially daunting. Try
lessening these children’s fears by
explaining that innovators they
may admire – from Thomas Edison
to Walt Disney to J. K. Rowling –
experienced numerous obstacles
and failures before succeeding
through sustained motivation and
perseverance.
5. Lead by example
One of the most effective ways
parents can teach their children to
embrace learning is to immerse them
in a household where the parents are
enthusiastic about learning as well.
Show your child your commitment to
learning by reading avidly, taking a
class, or engaging enthusiastically in
a hobby of your interest.
Not only will your child see that
working hard doesn’t have to be a
solitary undertaking, but she will
also witness firsthand the personal
satisfaction that comes from relishing
a challenge.
Although it seems counterintuitive
at first, part of helping children learn
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