sporting event you could probably live without with your
son and take your daughter to see The Nutcracker for
the umpteenth time. You will also go to the office party
with your husband. If these are the things that make the
holidays magic for them, who are you to disagree?
5. Create your perfect holiday. If you can’t remember the last
time you just stayed home for Christmas and unwrapped
gifts from under your own tree, then maybe it’s time to
simplify your Christmas without feeling like you have
to apologize to the entire world. The beauty of taking
charge, having personal preferences, and sharing and
receiving ideas within the family is that you can now
communicate what you all need to your extended family
members. Yes, your family is allowed to carve out your
traditions and create your own memories. And now that
you know what they are, it’s your responsibility to follow
through as best you can.
6. Communicate without guilt. Give the extended family
plenty of time to accept your plans. They don’t have to
like them. In fact, you might think they will never speak
to you again. But part of being an adult is learning
to let other people face with their feelings without
continually adjusting your needs to fit theirs. Guilt may
have been the type of internalized shame that kept you
in line in the past, but it’s time to shake off this type
of programming and live the life that really makes you
happy.
7. Be the change you want to see in your world. Perhaps you
have heard the quote, attributed to Mahatma Ghandi,
“Be the change you want to see in the world.” But what
he may have really said is, “If we could change ourselves,
the tendencies in the world would also change.” In other
words, our personal happiness does matter and the way
we live does impact the world. So in claiming our joy, we
make the world a more positive place, as well.
Activate The Power Of Personal Choice
Be creative in your decision-making process. Remember,
there is no such thing as one right choice for everyone.
Choose whatever makes sense for your family.
• You could go to a soup kitchen or you could take this
year off and make soup at home.
• You could fly across the country to see your great aunt
and grandmother or you could go next year.
• You could go to every holiday party you are invited to
or you could confer with the family about each choice
first.
• You could feel guilty about not visiting your in-laws
or you could send a beautiful card and thoughtful gift
instead.
• You could attend midnight mass or you could create
your own spiritual celebrations at home.
• You could invite friends and family over for holiday
meals or you could just have one potluck for the whole
season.
• What you choose to do this year does not have to be
the new tradition. Try things and see what sticks.