wrong at first, but it soon dawned on me that your absence really bothered me. You were
gone, and it hurt.
I had a great time. It was just the last week, a simple day, but in your presence it took
on more life somehow. I was happy everyday, because I knew I'd get to see you. And the
few times where we've actually spent hours together, talking and laughing about
nothing...those have been some of my most pleasant memories.
I never gave it much thought really, because I didn't see anything unusual about it. It's
like I tried to tell you earlier tonight, you are an amazing and unique blend of sweet,
caring personality and unimaginable, breath-taking voice. I wish I could have said it
like that earlier. I wish I could have told you that just being with you, just talking and
laughing with you, made me feel like I haven't felt in a long, long time. I cannot
explain this jubilance that overtakes me when you're around, but somehow I feel happier,
I feel more at ease, I feel more alive.
I don't know if I'd call it love. I don't know WHAT I'd call it, actually. What do you call
it when you enjoy just being in the same room as someone, when you look forward to
spending time with them, when their very presence, their smile, their voice lifts your
spirit? What do you call it when you ache because they're not with you, and when you
get a rush of adrenaline just thinking about them? When you tingle with excitement
every time their name crosses your lips?
All of this and more has been on my heart off late. I cannot explain it. I have no right or
reason to entertain such feelings, yet they persist just the same.
Maybe that's all these feelings are. My heart chasing its own dreams. I don't know. My
every thought - EVERY thought - was on you. That day, when I lay down next to my
sister and closed my eyes, I saw you. I saw us smiling and laughing.
I don't know what this means, but I hope to find an answer someday. There's so much
about you that I simply adore. I could go on and on. In every conceivable way, you are
the single most amazing person I've ever met.