OMG Digital Magazine OMG Issue 286 7th December 2017 | Page 6

OMG Digital Magazine | 286 | Thursday 7 December 2017 • PAGE 6
SoulFood
Secrets That Successful Women
Use to Achieve Their Goals
By Heidi Grant, PhD
When you set yourself a goal, try to be as specific as
possible. "Lose 5 pounds" is a better goal than "lose some
weight," because it gives you a clear idea of what success
looks like. Knowing exactly what you want to achieve
keeps you motivated until you get there. Also, think about
the specific actions that you need to take to reach your
goal. Just promising you'll "eat less" or "sleep more" is too
vague; be clear and precise. "I'll be in bed by 10 p.m. on
weeknights" leaves no room for doubt about what you
need to do, and whether or not you've actually done it.
Whenever I ask people to tell me about their goals, I
hear them say that they want to "get ahead at work" or
"eat healthier" or "spend less and save more." To which I
respond, "Okay, but what will success look like? How will
you know when you have reached your goal?" Usually,
that's followed by a long pause, and a look of confusion.
Then a reply something along the lines of "I hadn't really
thought about that."
Taking the time to get specific and spell out exactly what
you want to achieve removes the possibility of settling for
less—of telling yourself that what you've done is "good
enough." It also makes the course of action you need to
take much clearer. (If my goal is to "get along better with
my mother," it isn't obvious what I should do to reach
it. But if I get more specific and instead make my goal
to "speak to my mother at least twice a week," I know
exactly what I need to do and how often I need to do it.)
Thousands of studies have shown that getting specific is
one of the most critical (though often overlooked) steps to
take in reaching any goal.
Instead of "getting ahead at work," make your goal
something more concrete, such as "a pay raise of at least
$_____" or "a promotion to at least the ____ level." When
what you are striving for is vague, it's too tempting to take
the easy way out when you're feeling lazy, discouraged or
bored. But there's just no fooling yourself if you've set a
specific goal; you know when you've reached it and when
you haven't. If you haven't, you have little choice but to
hang in there and keep trying if you want to succeed.
Being specific about what you want is just the first step.
Next, you need to get specific about the obstacles that
lie in the way of getting what you want. In fact, what you
really need to do is go back and forth, thinking about the
success you want to achieve and the steps it will take to
get there. This strategy is called mental contrasting, and it
is a remarkably effective way to set goals and strengthen
your commitment.
To use the mental contrasting technique, first imagine
how you will feel attaining your goal. Picture it as vividly
as you can in your mind—really think about the details.
Next, think about the obstacles that stand in your way.
For instance, if you wanted to get a better, higher-paying
job, you would start by imagining the sense of pride and
excitement you would feel accepting a lucrative offer
at a top firm. Then, you would think about what stands
between you and that offer—namely, all the other really
outstanding candidates that will be applying for the same
job. Kind of makes you want to polish up your résumé a
bit, doesn't it?
That's called experiencing the necessity to act; it's a state
that is critical for reaching your goal, because it gets the
psychological wheels in motion. Daydreaming about how
great it will be to land that job can be very enjoyable, but
it won't actually get you the job. Mental contrasting turns
wishes and desires into reality by bringing attention and
clarity to what you will need to do to make them happen.
In studies my colleagues and I have conducted—looking
at situations ranging from 15-year-olds doing summer
prep for the PSAT, to human resource personnel trying
to manage their time better, to singles trying to find a
romantic partner, to pediatric nurses trying to improve
communication with parents—the results are always the
same. Mental contrasting reliably leads to greater effort,
energy, planning and overall higher rates of achieving
goals. Taking a few moments to mentally go back and
forth between the future you want and the hurdles you'll
have to overcome to get there will help you find both the
direction and motivation you need to succeed.
Putting It into Practice: Get Specific
1.    Write down your goal.
Example A: My goal is to get ahead at work.
Example B: My goal is to lose some weight.
2.    Ask yourself, "How will I know when I have succeeded?"
Describe the moment when you will know that you have
reached your goal.
Example A: I will know I have gotten ahead when my boss
tells me that I'm getting promoted to director.
Example B: I will know that I have lost weight when I can
fit into my size 8 jeans.
3.    Go back and rewrite the goal, using the information.
Example A: My goal is to get promoted to the director
level.
Example B: My goal is to fit into my size 8 jeans.
4.    Now for a little mental contrasting. Think about two
positive aspects of reaching your goals and two obstacles
that lie in the way.
Examples of positives: I will make more money. I will have
more influence on the company's strategy.
Examples of obstacles: My co-worker wants the same
promotion. I'm not sure what my boss is looking for.
5.    Beginning with the first positive aspect, write a few
sentences about what it will be like to experience it. Next,
write a few sentences about the first obstacle, and why
it's a problem. Repeat for the second positive aspect and
obstacle.
How do you feel right now? If you feel as if you have a
good chance of reaching your goal, you should be feeling
energized and determined. What do you need to do next?
Mental contrasting should help provide you with clarity as
to your next step.