OH! Magazine - Australian Version January 2014 (Australian Version) | Page 22

( Men’s Health )

MISCARRIAGE:
A GUIDE FOR MEN

Discussing miscarriage is still a bit taboo, especially
among men. But, thanks to raisingchildren.net.au
things are starting to change.

miscarriage (sometimes called
pregnancy loss) is when a baby
dies before 20 weeks of pregnancy.
If your partner doesn’t know how long
she’s been pregnant, the doctors will say
she’s had a miscarriage if your baby is
born with no signs of life and weighing
less than 400g.
Miscarriage is common, but it’s hard to
say exactly how often it happens. This is
because many miscarriages happen
before a woman knows she’s pregnant.
Around 15 to 20 per cent of confirmed
pregnancies are miscarried.
Miscarriage happens for many different
reasons. Usually it’s because the pregnancy
isn’t developing properly. Once a
miscarriage begins, no medical treatment
can stop it.

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22

ISSUE 6 ( OH! MAGAZINE )

“The miscarriage really came as a
surprise the first time. It was after six
weeks and it was a blighted ovum,
which means that the foetus had
stopped growing at two to three
weeks.” – Marcus, father of one

Sharing grief about miscarriage
You and your partner are likely to feel very
sad, helpless and distressed if your
doctor tells you that the pregnancy has
definitely ended.
Most likely, your partner’s body had
begun to change and she had started to
think of herself as a mother. You might
have started to think about being a dad.
Instead, you’re faced with loss and grief.

But because most miscarriages
happen in the first 12 weeks, some
women don’t know they’re pregnant.
Even if you both knew, you might not
have shared the news with others. This
can make the grief more complicated.
Many people don’t have rituals or
ceremonies to help them with the grief
of miscarriage. It can also be hard to
talk about miscarriage with other people.
It’s okay if you decide to put on a
‘brave face’, but people might not
realise that you’re going through a lot
of grief.
Many people find that it does help to
tell others. You could let close friends
and family know what your baby meant to
you, what support you need and how
much you want to share your experience.