My first Magazine May 2017 issue | Page 35

MYSTERY OF BIRTHMARKS was replaced by ill-treatment , unrealistic adjustments, helplessness, hurt, anger, confusion, emotional disconnection and want of complete freedom, just similar to what her daughter was feeling today. , She had to learn the art of being a pleaser to survive in a joint family setup wherein, she had to adjust not only with her husband's need for unnatural sex, [her husband was a sadist - a sadist is person who derives pleasure, especially sexual gratication, from inicting pain or humiliation on others] but also with a very dominating mother-in-law, this had deep impact her as well as the unborn babies psyche. She had to keep a very delicate balance wherein she needed to feel that she had done a great role of being a daughter-in-law, a mother to her kids and a good wife to husband. She felt that she did not have a choice, but to succumb to physical, emotional mental torture to maintain the harmony for her house. She wanted her daughter to display empathy, understanding and love , she also wanted Miss X to understand and forgive her. Mr's Y also had a silent expectation through out pregnancy, that the birth of miss X was going transform her bad destiny and marriage into a meaningful and peaceful life. Marital sexual abuse is common in India and our laws have no such protection for females. It is assumed that If the couple has a child then they are happy. The ugliness of martial discord is camouaged by the expectations of adjustment. It is considered safe to stay in such a marriage than take any action due to the fear of dirty linen being washed in the public causing public scrutiny and humiliation created by tarnished self-image in public. Lets understand what were the birthmarks connected with. Each mark on miss X's body had a different story and tonality. The birth mark around the corner of the left eye was connected the emotional need of Mrs Y for love and affection from her husband. Her needed to be supported within a joint family by her 31 MAY 2017 husband, this made her peep through the corner of her eyes to see if her husband was around to support her. Since he was never around and need to be embraced left unfullled and this left a dark mark on her daughters face, at the corner of her left eye. Mothers need had translated and got transferred to her unborn baby as this need had increased in pregnancy. Miss X had a birth mark on her right arm as if there were nger marks. Like the marks which are left behind when one holds the persons arm. On probing, as to who had held Mrs. Y ar m during pregnancy , and what was a traumatic event that had lead to such deep birth mark on her daughters arms brought up surpassed memory. Along with nerves racking sobs and screams she narrated the incident where of how she was feeling pregnancy pangs to eat compulsively a food delicacy called pav bhaji [ a food delicacy of west of India] .She entered the kitchen to cook and her mother-in-law caught her by her arm and threw her physi-