Reflections of A Retired Music Therapist
Nina Galerstein, MME, MT-BC
Last year I retired from the facility where I’ ve worked since 1979. I am not exactly the voice of music therapy retirement though. Technically, I left a long time ago, when I stopped having interns. I think for me it was a question of not having the energy to be creative. Music therapy is a great clinical practice... just not for me.
I learned about music therapy by accident. I discovered Gaston ' s Music in Therapy in the stacks of a local college library while looking for ideas for a high school paper. Fascinated, I went out and bought the book( I still cannot part with it).
I ended up getting a degree in music therapy from the University of Kansas in 1977 when few people had heard of this profession, and we were constantly trying to explain what it was. I completed my internship at Stockley Center in Delaware in 1979, where I ended up working for the next 35 years!
My job title when I started at Stockley was Case Manager, one of the many at our facility. The only job requirement related to music therapy was supervising an intern, and that was largely because I was a Registered Music Therapist( although I wasn’ t yet the Clinical Training Director). So I have to confess: I wasn ' t actually practicing as a clinical music therapist, and yet I was supervising an intern. In fact, I started supervising my first intern just a few months after I finished my own internship. Surprisingly, this never fazed me. I think I knew, even then, my calling was to mentor music therapy students. I felt equally at ease planning for an intern as planning for a client …. and much more excited about supervising the intern.
From 1979-1990 I continued to supervise interns and to work as a case manager, but I was becoming conflicted in my feelings about being a music therapist. On the one hand, I thought( and still think) it is a great treatment modality. I could easily get teary-eyed hearing the success stories of fellow music therapists. I loved going to conferences, learning new things, being with“ my people,” and even presenting. I loved conference planning work and served on my regional board. On the other hand, I never really enjoyed the prospect of sitting in sessions hour after hour. I maintained a small clinical practice outside my facility, and I believe I did good work, but I never loved it. I never looked forward to going to those sessions, although I enjoyed the work once I was there.
At the time I avoided delving into what this meant. It seemed to me my music therapy friends all loved their work and couldn’ t get enough time with their patients / clients. What was wrong with me that I didn’ t feel this way? I now realize part of it was feeling as if I didn’ t have good enough skills as a musician. The best music therapists seemed to me to be great musicians and could bring those skills into their clinical work. My instrument was flute, and it did not work as a clinical instrument at all. So how could I ever be a great music therapist if I wasn’ t a great musician? And yet I was very devoted to the field of music therapy. This, as I said, was a great source of conflict.
The other truth is for some people making music is a passion. My father pushed me in the direction of music in general and even a little toward music therapy. My real passion, though, has always been the theater, but I never felt I could be an actor. If I had known then what I know now I’ d have been a professional stage manager. This
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