The Background: At the time, I was working 30 hours a week at a hospital and 4 hours a week at a hospice agency with two particular clients. Both jobs were great on the clinical side of things: supportive supervisors and lots of freedom. Both also had their downsides: the hospital gig was a per diem position which didn’ t make me eligible for paid time off, salary raises, or benefits. I was a contractor with the hospice agency, and I had to do the business end of things like invoicing, which is something I don’ t really care for. I’ ve always been active online by being a part of the Music Therapy Round Table Podcast 1 and blogging. But my online adventures were more of a hobby than anything.
The first surprise: I thought about this constantly. I would be at work and wrap up a session that was filled with great music therapy moments. I wondered,“ How could I leave this wonderful work?” I would be at home pre-washing teeny tiny baby clothes and feeling the baby kick and I would think,“ How could I leave this person for work?” I had to make a decision soon because time was moving on, and this baby was coming.
Leaving Music Therapy: Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Michelle Erfurt, MT-BC
“ Am I letting down music therapy if I go?” That was a question I asked a friend when I was very pregnant with my first child and trying to decide what to do – Should I stay in the field and take a traditional maternity leave from my job? Or should I go away from the field and enjoy“ Stay At Home Mom” status? It seemed a very serious and final decision. I learned a lot about myself after going through this process that was full of surprises.
The Background: At the time, I was working 30 hours a week at a hospital and 4 hours a week at a hospice agency with two particular clients. Both jobs were great on the clinical side of things: supportive supervisors and lots of freedom. Both also had their downsides: the hospital gig was a per diem position which didn’ t make me eligible for paid time off, salary raises, or benefits. I was a contractor with the hospice agency, and I had to do the business end of things like invoicing, which is something I don’ t really care for. I’ ve always been active online by being a part of the Music Therapy Round Table Podcast 1 and blogging. But my online adventures were more of a hobby than anything.
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Music Therapy Round Table Podcast( http:// www. musictherapyroundtable. com)
I was working and it was going well for me. I’ d often drive home with a smile on my face thinking,“ I love my job!” I made money. Both my professional and personal cups were full.
Then my husband and I decided to start a family, and I became pregnant. That was when it hit me: we have to take care of this kid! How do we take care of this kid? Where is he going to go during the day? What do we do?
We had to make a decision and my husband left it up to me. It was not an option for him to leave his job: it came with benefits( mine did not), he made a reasonable amount of money( more than me), he had been there longer( so he had lots more paid time off and other extras compared to me), and- though he never admitted this- I don’ t think he wanted to be a stay at home dad. I could respect that, and I couldn’ t see him in that role either.
So, when we talked about how we wanted to take care of this kid, he just said“ Whatever you want, babe. It’ s your decision”- something I both loved and hated hearing at the same time.
It is very difficult for me to make decisions. I look at both sides so much that I can’ t pick one. So I wrote countless pro and con lists. I talked with friends and family members who went through this. I did a lot of budgeting to see if we could afford day care with both of us working( we could but it was a little more than my earnings so if I didn’ t work at all, we could budget and live within our means or, if I did work, we would still have to budget, but we’ d be living within our means).
In the end, it really came down to my personal preference … What did I want? Did I wan to leave music therapy and stay home with my son?
The first surprise: I thought about this constantly. I would be at work and wrap up a session that was filled with great music therapy moments. I wondered,“ How could I leave this wonderful work?” I would be at home pre-washing teeny tiny baby clothes and feeling the baby kick and I would think,“ How could I leave this person for work?” I had to make a decision soon because time was moving on, and this baby was coming.
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