Being Alone
Without Feeling Lonely
Loneliness is defined as the absence of company. Wanting to be alone, even when they want the company of one, is an assertive right that the person can exercise whenever they need it, of their own free will to seek their time and space individually and alone.
Understood in this way, it does not have to be a problem since the person does not feel isolated or imply any impairment to our self-esteem. The person uses his time and space for themselves and enjoys it without giving up their moments of interaction with the world; they decide to be alone but not feel alone.
Knowing how to be alone and enjoy solitude is essential to have healthy self-esteem since the way of relating to the world will not be from the need and the impossibility of being in continuous company, with the false belief that, if I do not have the approval or protection of others, by oneself one is nothing or nothing is achieved.
If we feel this erroneous belief, this circumstance can cause us to be emotionally dependent. It will increase anxiety levels when we find ourselves alone because we do not have a partner or we are not continuously with other people in our day-to-day lives.
Feeling Lonely is Not the Same as Being Alone
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Having the feeling of being lonely in the long run can affect our mental health. Interpreting that being alone is unpleasant can generate insecurities and fears because we believe we cannot live alone, lose self-confidence, and doubt our decisions.
When loneliness lasts over time, negative emotions (sadness, hopelessness, anger) are more intense and can lead us to a depressed or even anxious state. In this situation, loneliness generates a biological activation that the mind interprets as a threat and arouses fear that prevents relating to the environment, which leads to avoiding and increasing the feeling of loneliness and generating other emotions such as frustration.
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