others. When we suffer unrequited or unexpressed love, it just eats us alive, right? When we are bothered about something or someone we care about, the feeling is heavy and unpleasant, maybe even unbearably so. When we care enough to love but the lines of communication are down, a relationship can quickly deteriorate and fall apart.
Bad communication starves love- and negative emotions compromise the workings of the body in measurable ways. Given enough time, the feelings we don’ t communicate will rot us away from the inside.
Take fear. When things become tough, we mentally flinch, as we do when our skin touches something hot or cold and we jerk away before the pain hits us. It’ s entirely natural to fear to communicate, because we don’ t want to hurt and lose love. Subconsciously, our brain works to protect us, even at the expense of taking those risks with the heart that are so necessary to find true love. The mind plays tricks. We fail to leap- and stagnate, by playing it too safe.
For most people, myself included, it’ s a daily battle to tune out fear, to be brave enough to ignore the voices of insecurity and doubt and to find that strong, calm, quiet voice that guides us true.
Pain is another enemy of good communication, and I’ ve seen it up close as it rips into my patients. Pain is cruel. Pain can makes us believe the worst of ourselves when we desperately need to be strong. Worse, it corrupts. Pain metastasizes love into something corrosive and harmful- and it can even replace it, so we become emotionally dependent on feeling bad.
In my professional experience as a chronic pain expert, I’ ve learned the grave consequence of miscommunicating pain. We shut ourselves down. We shun communication. Our misguided, fickle mind says communicating is the last thing we need, instead of speaking the truth, that it’ s the first thing. We clam up and build walls.
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As a former chronic pain sufferer, I’ ve seen those walls from both sides. The antidote is simple.( In fact, most aspects of living well are simple in theory. We’ re a species of obsessive over-complicators.) The“ secret” is: you talk.
When we talk, we express emotion- and feel better, relieved, more loved, unburdened, healthier. The more we channel our true feelings into what we say to others( and to ourselves), the better our mind and bodies will behave and function. It’ s that simple.
Life is about how much we care. Caring is the communication of feelings, about ourselves and in consequence, about the world around us. Caring draws people towards us, since we’ re attracted to those who can express the emotions that create the most joy and fulfilment inside ourselves. Caring unlocks everything- including the clarity you need to communicate better than at any time in your life.
Both as a doctor and as the energetic, confused girl I always was- I urge you to show you care, until the world makes sense again.
TESTIMONIALS
“ While working with Mariana I had a major breakthrough in an area of my life that I wasn’ t even aware of. She’ s a great healer and listener who’ s also patient and gentle. It was a huge part in my healing journey to becoming more of my true self and reaching my highest potential.” ~ Nadjejda Chapoteau, USA.
“ The first step of mystery and uncertainty disappears as soon as you connect with Mariana, turning into a sense of trust, care and desire to connect with the cause of discomfort, not only to alleviate a symptom.” ~ Jaume Marin, Spain