Life Without Conflict Life Without Conflict | Page 82

Life Without Conflict
65
Dadashri : When others see love in you even when you
reprimand and scold them. Even if you reprimand your child, he
will see love in you. You can reprimand your children, but do
so with love, only then will they improve. If a college professor
were to reprimand his students, they would beat him up.
Your efforts should be aimed for the betterment of the
other person, but any effort that causes a reaction, should be
avoided. If you rebuke someone and he or she feels bad, then
that effort is not worthy. Your efforts should be made from
within, in a subtle manner. If your overt efforts are futile, you
should make the efforts from within. If you do not want to
reprimand at length, then do so in few words Just tell him, “Son
this does not suit us (as a family).”’ Say only this much and then
keep quiet. You have to say something, but you must know the
proper way to say it.
Otherwise, Adjust With a Prayer
Questioner : I made my effort to make the other person
understand. Whether he understands or not, is it not his
purushartha (effort)?
Dadashri : The extent of your responsibility is to explain
things to him. After that, whether or not he understands, there
is nothing you can do. At the very least, you should do this
much. You should pray, “Dada Bhagwan (the Lord within)!
Grant him the right intellect.” You cannot leave that person
hanging. This is the absolute truth; this is Dada’s science of
adjustment. It is a wonderful adjustment. Do you not get the
taste of the consequences wherever you fail to adjust? Inability
to adjust is sheer foolishness, it happens because a person
believes he is the boss and everything should go according to
his plans. For that, he will have to starve his entire life and one
day, he may be served with poison. Let things be. This is
Kaliyug! Just look at the environment! If your wife tells you