before putting him in the office of deacon or pastor . The reason this is important is that there is one person who knows a man better than anyone else does , and that is his wife . This is also true of a man ’ s children , and true of a younger man ’ s parents . Those closest to you are going to see the best and worst in you . Those closest to you will see your sin the most . They will see you when you are the most tired , grumpy , frustrated , and angry . No man is without fault at home . So , the issue is not that you are without any fault . The issue is how you respond when you are at fault at home .
A good friend of mine told me a story about his dad a few years ago that had a profound effect on me . My friend was at a county fair with his father when he was seven years old . He desperately wanted to ride the ponies , but the sign said that only kids six and under could ride . So , his father lied and told the operator his son was six so he could ride . My friend said that when he got off the ride , his dad ’ s countenance was noticeably different , and he wasn ’ t the same the rest of the day . Late that night , after my friend was in bed , his father came into his room , got on his knees , and while weeping , acknowledged to his son what he had done was sin and repented . That is what it means to be blameless at home .
“ To be blameless means to be a man of unquestionable integrity .”
Someone once said that being blameless at home is “ righting your wrongs .” You will do wrong . Over and over again . But the question is , do you make it right ?
I want my kids to see me repent . I want them to see me weep over my sin . I want them to hear me say I ’ m sorry . They will never be able to say I am without blemish , but hopefully , through years of repentance and growth , they will say I am without blame .
You cultivate this quality by being quick to humbly repent when you are wrong . You cultivate it by asking those in your home to point out areas in which you need to improve . This is cultivated in the mundane moments as you seek to love and serve your family more . It is cultivated when you begin to see your home as the primary training ground for true manhood . It is cultivated when you seek to grow in your sacrificial , humble , Christcentered love for your family and those around you .
Your blamelessness is also manifested in the community . Paul says that a man must not be “ open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination ” ( Titus 1:6 ). The phrase “ open to the charge ” is significant . It means to be open to accusation . It asks the question , “ Is there anyone out there with incriminating evidence against you ?” Anyone in the workplace , in the community , or even online ?
Imagine if we took an ad out in the newspaper and on social media with your name and picture with these words : “ We are thinking about bringing this man into a position of leadership at our church . Does anyone in the community have any reason to think this would be a bad idea ? Do you have any reason to think that having this man in a position of leadership in our church would hurt the reputation of Jesus Christ or our church ?”
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