Building a Strong Family
Jessica Smartt
October 4, 2021. Two weeks from Grammy’ s ninety-third birthday. Six of us huddled around her bed.
There are so many details I can’ t forget. The crackling rattle in her labored breathing, each breath so unnaturally far from the last one. My sister on the other side of the bed, so strong, singing hymns. Her voice wavered and caught, but she kept singing, distinctly and loudly.
I was not sure when it happened. Her breaths were minutes apart. When was she gone? When was she here? We told her she could go, that we would be okay. We realized she was crying— eyes glassy, distant, fixed on nothing— but somehow we knew she had heard.
In the final minutes, my dad spoke familiar, comforting words over her.“ In My Father’ s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also.” 1
It was a holy room, full of sorrow and hope, aching and beauty... and so much love.
She was dearly loved. I don’ t want to die, but I do want to die like that.
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