of us who hold a deep desire to be intentional with the ones God’ s entrusted us with, to build a lasting legacy of love and faith.
But if you aren’ t crying, maybe you’ re mad. Because maybe this all feels foreign, impossible. Family is so messy, so terribly specific and practical. You wonder if you have what it takes to break the cycle, to overcome the challenges in your circumstance to give your kids a different legacy. I want you to know: family doesn’ t have to be perfect to be strong.
You and I each have our own ideas of what a“ strong family” is.
Maybe we unconsciously picture this perpetually cheerful family, the perfect marriage— no big blowups, minimal stress, everyone magically agreeing about everything and being thrilled to spend time together.
Fortunately, that is not it. The really wonderful news is this: a strong family is not about perfection but grace.
I often draw deep strength from thinking about my Grammy as a young mom. Her husband was a traveling, amusing-but-mostly-absent man. She had no support system and moved thirtyfour times in her marriage. They were so poor my Grammy would cook dandelion soup and cow tongue for dinner for her little ones. There was nothing else to make. She struggled with health issues. Although we grandkids joked that she“ never sinned,” she assuredly was human and did not parent perfectly. Despite all this, what a legacy she built!
A strong family is not about superficial harmony but deep friendship.
A strong family is not about physical proximity but unshakable loyalty.
One of the things my mom would often say to us over the years is this:“ Come on home, and then we’ ll figure it out.” Maybe one of us had had a frustrating day, felt bogged down by unresolved problems or unsettling conversations.“ Just come on home,” she’ d say.“ We’ ll figure it out.”
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