1 . You ’ ll stand up for what you believe — not because you need to be right but because you ’ re not afraid to be wrong .
2 . You ’ re a power listener . You ’ re much more interested in what others have to say rather than forcing your own opinion .
3 . You ’ re intentional about encouraging others . You observe people closely and give them the right word at the right time . People get better when they ’ ve been with you .
4 . You ’ re open to asking for help . Insecure people don ’ t want to appear incompetent , but confident people are honest about their shortcomings .
How can we change our attitude ? By changing the way we think . Our attitude is fluid , not fixed . We can choose it , and we can change it . James Allen wrote , “ Every action and feeling is preceded by a thought .” The thought comes first ; the feeling follows . If we want to change our feelings , we start by changing our thoughts .
Have you ever tried to stop a feeling ? If you ’ re mad , sad , or glad , it ’ s tough to simply say , “ Well , I ’ ll just stop feeling that way .” The energy of the emotion is still there , and we can ’ t simply wish it away . Don ’ t try to change your feelings ; change the way you think , and your feelings will follow . King Solomon said , “ As a man thinks , so is he .”
We become what we think about .
5 . You don ’ t wait for others to make things happen for you ; you simply , quietly take steps to make it happen , with no fanfare .
6 . You don ’ t gossip . Insecure people put others down so they ’ re higher in comparison . You see others as fellow travelers .
7 . You keep going . Hardships aren ’ t barriers ; they ’ re opportunities to find new pathways .
Next Steps You might ask , “ Is it really possible to walk away from ‘ fake confidence ’ and develop the real thing ?” Absolutely . No matter what our patterns have been in the past , we can pick a new direction for the future . If faking it has been a lifelong pattern ( especially if trauma-based ), it might take professional help — but it ’ s always possible . There is always hope .
Want to become a different person — someone others are attracted to because of your attitude ? Pay attention to your thoughts . When you ’ re feeling negative , stop and ask yourself these two questions :
1 . What are the facts in this situation ?
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