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By Susan McNeal Velasquez
Imagine waking up tomorrow with a solid sense of who you are minus any of the residual pain from past decisions that didn ’ t turn out the way you wanted . You would be solidly connected to your present reality ; capable of successfully managing your life with clarity and confidence . You would be able to say yes when you mean yes and no when you mean no , without hesitation or confusion .
If it was possible to revisit every choice from your past when you said yes , but you really meant no , you would be able to uncover your choices that were made to manage your image .
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You would discover that you said yes to get others ’ approval , to people please , to turn over control , and to give up your commitment to your own needs , values , thoughts and feelings in favor of trying to fit in or look good .
If you could revisit the past and find every time you said no to opportunities and situations when you really wanted to say yes , you would discover how you turned down the volume , dimmed the lights and closed the door to your heart ’ s desires . You would uncover how you allowed your enthusiasm and anticipation of future happiness to be reduced to a trickle .
If you could get a readout of every time you said yes when you really meant no and no when you really meant yes , you would have an extremely accurate road map of how you became who you are today .
Self-mastery comes from the ability to stand in the present , aware of the fact that the point of our personal power to choose is rooted here . When we commit to fully living in the present , our past can then visit us to bring gifts of insight into where we made choices out of
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fear or ignorance and what prices we paid , and benefits we received as a result .
It takes courage to hone the skill of cutting through the debris of our past like a fine surgeon who doesn ’ t cut unless he is also willing to suture a wound . The past longs to gift us with usable insights that , when melded into our present , will give us the wisdom to make broader , more discerning choices today .
There is alchemy at work when our past , our present and our future convene in the present moment . Does this seem like an impossible task ? Is the thought of welcoming your past home feel overwhelming to you ? Are you holding yourself hostage to what you term unredeemable mistakes ? Are you living out a prison sentence by shuffling through the present , unwilling or unable to envision a future that is alive with enthusiasm and renewed purpose ?
I want to share an important secret with you . There is a shortcut that can free you from the debilitating aspects of a too serious approach to taking ownership of all aspects of your life .
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Identify one clear recent incident from your present reality that you can genuinely state : “ I wouldn ’ t have missed this for the world .” It may be the experience of a person , a place , a situation , a job , a vacation , a one-time interaction , or simply a kiss from Grace that ignited your body , mind , heart and spirit simultaneously .
Just one of those moments , clearly embraced , acknowledged and owned gives you a renewed platform and opportunity to create anew . Why ? Because it is logical . This perfect moment would not and could not have happened without each and every previous moment that came before it , whether judged harshly as bad or good , right or wrong . Our past is . Our present is . Our future is seeded in this present moment . The point of your power is in the present . Gather up all the delight in life you can and courageously step into your future today .
Susan has taught leadership development skills for more than three decades . She is the author of Beyond Intellect : Journey into the Wisdom of Your Intuitive Mind . Find her at : susanvelasquez . com .
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