CONTINUED
JUNE 2019
itsnever2latebooks.com
tures fused
Fourteen hundred fall-
ing stars flamed out
Five hundred and fif-
ty-five thousand fila-
ments failed
There didn’t that make
you laugh? Here’s an-
other tickler.
It’s time to stop golfing
when the trees begin to
chase you. Maybe be-
cause you hit a ball right
over them and caused
several leaves to die
unexpectedly. Making a
tough shot right in front
of a group of large trees
is not a laughing matter.
But if you swing hard,
hit the ball way up, right
slap it into the top of the
tree trunk, it will thud
back on the ground about
twelve inches from where
it started out and you will
laugh yourself silly.
If you ever had a han-
dle on life and it broke,
always remember no
matter how long it takes
to get another handle on
life, be patient, go out
and golf, hit ten hole-in-
one shots and become
a champion golfer, then
THE GOLF CART CHRONICLES
you can laugh at adversity.
Here are some uses for an old beat
up golf balls:
1. Use them to stuff a pillow
2. Use them as weights to keep
bugs away from your food
3. Use them as packing material
instead of plastic bubble stuff
4. Use them as grippers when
your golf vehicle gets stuck in
deep snow
5. Use them to crush crackers
in a plastic bag and make bird
crumbs
6. Use them as cheap home insu-
lation
7. Use them to hold down your
lunch box sandwiches
8. Us them in a port-a-potty for
emergency toilet paper
9. Use them to make a sidewalk
10. Use them to make a neck orna-
ment
Sorry to interrupt this story but
my golf car just got stuck in traffic
and a box full of my old beat up
golf balls fell out of the back seat.
The balls are rolling every which
way; people are running around
chasing my balls while laughing
like they were playing children’s
dodge ball.
Got to go now, I think I’ll join
them, the traffic is at a standstill,
so why not eh?
It has been so much fun
playing with words to
bring about amusing
and entertaining stories
portraying people and
other living things as out
of the ordinary.
So, I wrote, and wrote,
and wrote for over sixty-
five years. Each article
was stored away in a box
never to see the light of
day until now.
AVAILABLE ON AMAZON
Golf Cart Chronicles 1
&
Golf Cart Chronicles 2
golf carT chronicles
By Suzy
2
James
lf Cart
The Go les 2
ic
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Chro
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The Go les 2
Chronic
n of
mpilatio stories
rous co
A humo g related short
/golfin
golf car
tion of
A humorous compila
golf car/golf ing related
short stories
Suzy James
[email protected]
itsnever2latebook
books.com
www.itsnever2late
By Suzy James
JUNE 2019
37