CHAPTER IV 33
Here , leaning over the banister , I cried out suddenly , and without at all deliberating on my words -
" They are not fit to associate with me ."
Mrs . Reed was rather a stout woman ; but , on hearing this strange and audacious declaration , she ran nimbly up the stair , swept me like a whirlwind into the nursery , and crushing me down on the edge of my crib , dared me in an emphatic voice to rise from that place , or utter one syllable during the remainder of the day .
" What would Uncle Reed say to you , if he were alive ?" was my scarcely voluntary demand . I say scarcely voluntary , for it seemed as if my tongue pronounced words without my will consenting to their utterance : something spoke out of me over which I had no control .
" What ?" said Mrs . Reed under her breath : her usually cold composed grey eye became troubled with a look like fear ; she took her hand from my arm , and gazed at me as if she really did not know whether I were child or fiend . I was now in for it .
" My Uncle Reed is in heaven , and can see all you do and think ; and so can papa and mama : they know how you shut me up all day long , and how you wish me dead ."
Mrs . Reed soon rallied her spirits : she shook me most soundly , she boxed both my ears , and then left me without a word . Bessie supplied the hiatus by a homily of an hour ' s length , in which she proved beyond a doubt that I was the most wicked and abandoned child ever reared under a roof . I half believed her ; for I felt indeed only bad feelings surging in my breast .
November , December , and half of January passed away . Christmas and the New Year had been celebrated at Gateshead with the usual festive cheer ; presents had been interchanged , dinners and evening parties given . From every enjoyment I was , of course , excluded : my share of the gaiety consisted in witnessing the daily apparelling of Eliza and Georgiana , and