CHAPTER XVI 196
position at Thornfield and questioning why she had not been given into custody that morning , or , at the very least , dismissed from her master ' s service . He had almost as much as declared his conviction of her criminality last night : what mysterious cause withheld him from accusing her ? Why had he enjoined me , too , to secrecy ? It was strange : a bold , vindictive , and haughty gentleman seemed somehow in the power of one of the meanest of his dependants ; so much in her power , that even when she lifted her hand against his life , he dared not openly charge her with the attempt , much less punish her for it .
Had Grace been young and handsome , I should have been tempted to think that tenderer feelings than prudence or fear influenced Mr . Rochester in her behalf ; but , hard-favoured and matronly as she was , the idea could not be admitted . " Yet ," I reflected , " she has been young once ; her youth would be contemporary with her master ' s : Mrs . Fairfax told me once , she had lived here many years . I don ' t think she can ever have been pretty ; but , for aught I know , she may possess originality and strength of character to compensate for the want of personal advantages . Mr . Rochester is an amateur of the decided and eccentric : Grace is eccentric at least . What if a former caprice ( a freak very possible to a nature so sudden and headstrong as his ) has delivered him into her power , and she now exercises over his actions a secret influence , the result of his own indiscretion , which he cannot shake off , and dare not disregard ?" But , having reached this point of conjecture , Mrs . Poole ' s square , flat figure , and uncomely , dry , even coarse face , recurred so distinctly to my mind ' s eye , that I thought , " No ; impossible ! my supposition cannot be correct . Yet ," suggested the secret voice which talks to us in our own hearts , " you are not beautiful either , and perhaps Mr . Rochester approves you : at any rate , you have often felt as if he did ; and last night -- remember his words ; remember his look ; remember his voice !"
I well remembered all ; language , glance , and tone seemed at the moment vividly renewed . I was now in the schoolroom ; Adele was drawing ; I bent over her and directed her pencil . She looked up with a sort of start .