CHAPTER XV 184
contentment of his mood , and his newly revived pleasure in the old hall and its environs . I meditated wonderingly on this incident ; but gradually quitting it , as I found it for the present inexplicable , I turned to the consideration of my master ' s manner to myself . The confidence he had thought fit to repose in me seemed a tribute to my discretion : I regarded and accepted it as such . His deportment had now for some weeks been more uniform towards me than at the first . I never seemed in his way ; he did not take fits of chilling hauteur : when he met me unexpectedly , the encounter seemed welcome ; he had always a word and sometimes a smile for me : when summoned by formal invitation to his presence , I was honoured by a cordiality of reception that made me feel I really possessed the power to amuse him , and that these evening conferences were sought as much for his pleasure as for my benefit .
I , indeed , talked comparatively little , but I heard him talk with relish . It was his nature to be communicative ; he liked to open to a mind unacquainted with the world glimpses of its scenes and ways ( I do not mean its corrupt scenes and wicked ways , but such as derived their interest from the great scale on which they were acted , the strange novelty by which they were characterised ); and I had a keen delight in receiving the new ideas he offered , in imagining the new pictures he portrayed , and following him in thought through the new regions he disclosed , never startled or troubled by one noxious allusion .
The ease of his manner freed me from painful restraint : the friendly frankness , as correct as cordial , with which he treated me , drew me to him . I felt at times as if he were my relation rather than my master : yet he was imperious sometimes still ; but I did not mind that ; I saw it was his way . So happy , so gratified did I become with this new interest added to life , that I ceased to pine after kindred : my thin crescent-destiny seemed to enlarge ; the blanks of existence were filled up ; my bodily health improved ; I gathered flesh and strength .
And was Mr . Rochester now ugly in my eyes ? No , reader : gratitude , and many associations , all pleasurable and genial , made his face the object I best liked to see ; his presence in a room was more cheering than the