Industry Magazine Get JACK'D Magazine Winter 2019 | Page 11

critical teacher or parent? A dominating
sibling? The girl in your grade school who
always knew the right answer before you?
Or are you trying to protect a lover, co-
worker or spouse by not clearly stating
your needs, concerns or offering relevant
constructive criticism?
Awareness is everything. Just noticing
where we shut ourselves down (or up) is the
start of changing the pattern.
2. Give yourself permission to TAKE
YOUR TIME to build up your courage +
get clear.
Speaking truth is a muscle we build.
Sometimes, we need a little extra nudge or
the “inner cheerleader” to encourage us to
fully express ourselves. Instead of beating
yourself up for not saying what you really
wanted to on that phone call, congratulate
yourself for noticing the habit of avoidance
or sugarcoating. Then, make a vow to call
the person back or set an appropriate time
to revisit the conversation.
Sometimes, it takes awhile to develop
the clarity of what we really want to say
and how. It may be necessary to remove
ourselves from the emotion of the moment
and pause to drop into your center, or
Core Self, and feel what is underneath
the surface and needs to be said.
3. TRUST that “The Truth Shall Set You
Free”.
Yes, this is a nearly universal tenant in
the world’s ancient wisdom traditions (the
Bible, the Yoga Sutras).
In yoga, Satya, or Truth, is the second
(only after non-violence) of 10 lifestyle
foundations (yamasand niyamas) that
naturally set us up for freedom and
happiness.
Unequivocally, when we live a life based in
truth (actions and words), we are happier.
It may be the road less traveled, and seem
a little more arduous at times, but all those
little ways we lie to ourselves and each other
clog and sap our energy and unconsciously
hold us back from what we really want.
We end up wasting a lot of time when we
drag our feet and stall instead of facing
the music. Often we end up depressed
or negative and aren’t sure why – but our
energy is actually turning in on itself and on
some level we feel this self-abaondonment
and mistrust.
Truth cuts through illusion. When
we speak truth, we are wielding a
sword. It slices the fog of illusion and
sugarcoating. This will liberate every
single relationship you have and not only
set you free, but every other person in
the circumstance or moment, as well.
4. Have NO ATTACHMENT to how or if
your Truth is received.
Your Truth is subjective. It may not be
anyone else’s truth or they may very well
have their own version of it. However, your
Truth is valid! It deserves to be spoken.
It deserves to be heard. We can’t control
someone else’s perception, but we can give
our truth a voice.
Before you begin to speak, take a moment
to drop in + let go:
– Feel into your center.
– Take a couple deep breaths.
– Get grounded and dissolve your
attachment to any outcome.
– Release your attachment to it being
heard or validated in any way from the
outside.
– Know that your speaking truth and
standing up for your inner voice is enough.
5. PRACTICE this affirmation: “My
voice is necessary. What I have to say is
valuable.”
Many of us did not have role models who
demonstrated healthy communication.
Perhaps, you had a sibling who was always
dominating the conversation and you could
never get a word in edgewise. Or you were
one in a long line of siblings and home was
chaotic, loud and overwhelming. Maybe,
your mother always deferred to your father
and never voiced her true opinions and
feelings. Or maybe your family was living a
pack of lies to cover up alcoholism, sexual
abuse or family secrets. These patterns are
deeply ingrained and it’s necessary to lay
down new tracks in the unconscious mind.
Practice this mantra every time you feel
yourself hesitating to speak your honest
opinion and state your needs:
“My voice is necessary. What I have to say
is valuable.”
Give yourself permission to be heard. Your
truth is just as valuable as everyone else’s!
ABOUT ASHLEY TURNER
ASHLEY TURNER , M.A., MFTI (#62103) is a yoga/meditation teacher, registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern, writer, speaker and Initiated
Priestess. Deep, witty and laser focused, she draws on the source texts of yoga while incorporating the best of neurobiology, Jungian Psychology,
ayurveda, tantra, shamanism and priestess work – vigorously challenging students and clients from the inside out. She is known for her ability to translate
complex themes into practical, real-life tools accessible to all. As the Artist-in-Residence at Montage Laguna Beach, Ashley launched Montage’s signature
monthly yoga–mind–body workshops. Ashley is a sought after presenter at international events and conferences and contributor to top tier media
publications including Self, Shape, Mantra, Origin, Women’s Health, Yoga Journal and Natural Health. She focuses on a dynamic vinyasa style of yoga
infused with nuggets of wisdom from the roots of yoga psychology and philosophy, deep self-inquiry, devotion and humor. Ashley consults Hollywood
creatives, distinguished CEOs, couples, adolescents and individuals. With a diverse palate and ability to speak directly to her audience, Ashley has toured
with rock stars, lectured in academic settings and led transformational events worldwide. She lives by the beach in Marina Del Rey, California.
ashleyturner.org
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