BUILDING POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS
One Circle and Deep Breath at a Time
BY NATALIE KIRO
“I’m
model the role of mediator for a while,
a 1 today, because I’m
students give a thumbs up or down based
working through questions such as:
thinking about my
on the circumstance.
What happened? Who was affected by
grandma who passed
Other portions of our DC build
your action/s? How can we fix this? By
away,” one of my students
relationships as well. For example, students
sadly shares. In response, my other
students
pass
a
talking
piece
to
answer
the
Question
Building Positive Relationships One Circle and Deep Breath December,
at a Time any student neutral to the
conflict can take on this role. Does this
share in his sorrowful face and give him
of the Day. We’ve shared answers to
really work? Absolutely. Now, this is not to
a thumbs down. The practice of rating
questions ranging from, “What’s your
By. Natalie Kiro
say that conflicts disappear. We do Conflict
our feelings from 1-5 is part of our weekly
favorite snack?” to “What’s the saddest
Resolutions
difference is that
Dialogue Circle. These Circles, in addition
that’s
happened
you?”
The who passed
“I’m a 1 today, thing
because
I’m ever
thinking
about to my
grandma
away,” weekly.
one of The
my students
students
communicate
to Conflict Resolution procedures sadly
and shares. In questions
by the
students
response, are
my generated
other students
share
in his sorrowful
face can
and clearly
give him
a thumbs their
feelings
they want
to fix These
their mistakes
acts of mindfulness, enable my students
and the
skills of our
speaking
listening
to of our
down. The practice
of rating
feelings and
from
1-5 is part
weekly and
Dialogue
Circle.
Circles,
to (evidenced
Conflict Resolution
procedures
of mindfulness,
enable my we have built
of the community
to build lifelong skills beyond reading
and in addition
others
by eye contact,
body and acts because
students to build
lifelong etc.)
skills is beyond
reading
and do
arithmetic.
through DC.
arithmetic.
language,
practiced.
We also
a
The final step to DC is at the teacher’s
Many of my students, and those across
daily activity. A class favorite is “Fill Your
contact,
body
language,
etc.)
Many of my students,
those
across one
our student
district,
deal
traumatic
experiences
on a singing
daily songs or
discretion.
Some choose
our district, deal with traumatic experiences
Bucket.” and
In this
activity,
sits
in with
is past
practiced.
We
also do and
a relived. In some cases,
basis.
Perhaps
this
trauma
is
fresh
or
maybe,
trauma
is
triggered
reading a story. We do yoga. Some days
on a daily basis. Perhaps this trauma is fresh
the center of our circle while the remaining
daily
activity.
A class
our place
children
at the into
core a bucket
and
normal,
daily
routines
unbearable.
we only seem
have time
for a few postures, a
or maybe, past trauma is triggered trauma
and has changed
students
a block
after
favorite
is “Fill Your
type, the
trauma
cannot
be ignored
or competed
against.
Many
of a our
child’s
pose
here
tree students
pose there, but
relived. In some cases, trauma has Regardless
changed of the
giving
selected
student
a compliment.
Bucket.”
In
this
activity,
who act out in undesirable ways are reacting to distress. Over the last 11 years, I have learned
when
we
get
our
work
done
early and the
our children at the core and normal, daily
All compliments have to be character
one student
sits in the center
that teaching students soft skills such as listening
and problem-solving
is crucial.
is agreeable my kiddos love doing
routines seem unbearable. Regardless
based. For example, “You’re really
smart.
” while weather
of our
circle
the
yoga
outside.
I got mats for each of them
of the type, trauma cannot be ignored or
While the focus of DC is building
remaining
students
place
a the idea
I became familiar with Dialogue Circles (DCs)
when I began
researching
of Restorative
they
our practice
competed against. Many of our students
relationships,
sometimes
we have
students
block
into
a bucket so after
Justice, the practice
of restoring
relationships
among
wrong-doers
and take
victims.
In order very
for seriously.
giving
the
selected
student
a
Why
yoga?
As
mentioned
my
who act out in undesirable ways are
reacting
in
conflict
so
our
daily
activity
is
replaced
restorative practices to truly work, students must build positive relationships not only with previously,
their
compliment.
All students
to me a daily
to distress. Over the last 11 years, peers
I have and teachers,
with but
a Conflict
Resolution
mini-circle.
also with
themselves.
If done In
thoughtfully,
DCs come
can create
calm, with
safe trauma.
compliments
to be of mindfulness,
Acts
such as want
yoga (which is
learned that teaching students soft skills
this instance, the students in conflict
sit in have
environment
in which students
character based.
the
practice
of moving to one’s own breath)
such as listening and problem-solving is
the center of the circle with a mediator.
I and For
expect
to learn.
example, “You’re promotes
really
healthy bodies and minds and
crucial.
smart.”
something
do to
decrease my own
I became familiar with
Each is DC,
begins I with
mindfulness.
For stressors
a few moments,
in life. we slow down,
Dialogue Circles (DCs) when I
While the focus of DC is
Fill Your Bucket Activity: Jayden Smith pays Chaney Lewis a compliment.
take deep
breaths
focus
on our
If you’d
like and
to learn
more,
please contact
began researching
idea of
building the
relationships,
sometimes we have students in conflict so our daily activity is replaced
current
thoughts.
This is perhaps the
me
at
[email protected].
Restorative with
Justice,
the
practice
a Conflict Resolution mini-circle. In this instance, the students in conflict sit in the center
first moment all day that students are
of restoring of
relationships
among
the circle with
a mediator. I model the role of mediator for a while, working through
able to reflect on their current state,
wrong-doers
and victims.
In What happened? Who was affected by your action/s? How can we
questions
such as:
fix this?
contact
which leads into our daily check-in.
order for restorative
practices
to
is pract
By December, any student neutral to the conflict can take on this role. Does this really work?
As noted above, students rate
daily ac
truly work, students
must
build this is not to say that conflicts disappear. We do Conflict Resolutions
Absolutely.
Now,
weekly.
themselves from 1-5 and explain their
favorite
The difference
is that students can clearly communicate their feelings and they want to fix their
positive relationships
not only
Bucket
self-rating (5 is awesome and 1 is
mistakes
because
of
the
community
we
have
built
through
DC.
with their peers and teachers,
one stu
awful). This reflective practice
of our c
but also with themselves. If done
teaches
st udents
to
understand
their
remain
The
final
to DC
a story.
thoughtfully,
DCs
can step
create
a is at the teacher’s discretion. Some choose singing songs or reading
feelings
and encourages them to
block i
We
do
yoga.
Some
days
we
only
have
time
for
a
few
postures,
a
child’s
pose
here
a
tree
pose
calm, safe environment in which
giving
verbally
communicate
with
others
as
there,
when to
we learn.
get our work
students want
and but
expect
compli
to why
done early and the weather
is they feel this way. This practice also teaches
compli
Selena Hawkins, Destiny Poole, Naishawn Hines, Keniyah Scott
Each DC, begins with mindfulness.
For While one student shares, other students
empathy.
agreeable my kiddos love doing
charact
a few moments,
we
slow
down,
take
deep
give
a
thumbs
up
or
down
based
on
the
circumstance.
exampl
yoga outside. I got mats for each
breaths and of focus
thoughts.
smart.”
them on
so our
they current
take our
practice
portions of our DC build relationships as well. For example, students pass a talking piece
This is perhaps
first moment
all Other
day As
that
very the
seriously.
Why yoga?
While t
answer the Question of the Day. We’ve shared answers to Fill Your Bucket Activity: Jayden Smith pays Chaney Lewis a compliment.
questions ranging from, “What’s
students are mentioned
able to reflect
on their to
current
previously,
my
relationships,
sometimes
we have students in conflict so our daily a
your with
favorite snack?” to “What’s the saddest thing that’s ever building
happened
to you?”
The questions
state, which students
leads into
our to daily
come
me check-in.
daily
with a Conflict Resolution mini-circle. In this instance, the students in conf
are generated
to with
others
(evidenced
by the
eye role of mediator for a while, work
As noted above,
students
rate
themselves
trauma.
Acts of
mindfulness,
such by the students and the skills of speaking and listening
of the circle
a mediator.
I model
questions
such
as:
What
happened?
Who
was affected by your action/s? Ho
as
yoga
(which
is
the
practice
of
from 1-5 and explain their self-rating (5 is
Students do tree pose
By December, any student
neutral
during
yoga. to the conflict can take on this role. Does
moving
to one’s
own
breath)
awesome and
1 is awful).
This
reflective
Absolutely. Now, this is not to say that conflicts disappear. We do Conflic
promotes
healthy
bodies and
practice teaches
students
to understand
The difference is that students can clearly communicate their feelings and th
minds
and
is
something
I
do
to
their feelings and encourages them to
mistakes because of the community we have built through DC.
decrease my with
own others
stressors
in why
life.
verbally communicate
as to
The final step to DC is at the teacher’s discretion. Some choose singing son
they feel this way. This practice also teaches
We do yoga. Some days we only have time for a few postures, a child’s pos
If you’d like to learn more, please
empathy. While one student shares, other
there, but when we get our work
contact me at [email protected]
done early and the weather is
agreeable my kiddos love doing
yoga outside. I got mats for each
HILLS ❘
of them so WOODLAND
they take our practice
very seriously. Why yoga? As
mentioned previously, my
FALL 2018
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