IDENTIDADES 1 ENGLISH IDENTIDADES 5 ENGLISH | Page 60

Did classmates or teachers mistreat you
at school?

very close to my mother and suffered a lot
those two years without her by my side.

I am convinced there are many people like
myself, and they’ve been through situations
just like mine, or worse. I had to live
through a rough time; by the 1980s the
view of homosexuals was they were very
different, and homophobia still persists.
Against my will, I was given a scholarship
to go to a school in the country, so I could
straighten up and become a man.

What would they say about your condition at home?
My parents and other relatives knew about
my condition, since I have always been the
kind that cannot hide things, nor wanted to,
ever since I was a kid. Yet, there are many
who lead a double life, fooling women and
families. My homosexuality doesn’t hurt
anyone; I have no reason to fake what I am
just to be accepted by society.

Both students and teachers mistreated me in
many ways. One professor verbally abused
me and kicked me so hard it hurt my back. I
escaped from school and ran through the
cornfields; various teachers were chasing
me, till they finally took me to the principal
and controlled by hysteria.

How did your sexuality influence your
education?
A lot. I got held back in eighth grade due to
a problem regarding inclusion; it was hard
for me to adapt to certain environments and
was constantly being watched by both
adults and my classmates. I was seen as
abnormal; my gestures and feminine face
were a big problem for them and they even
affected me with respect to my lifestyle. I
became an apathetic youth, developed a
fear of being out, and was afraid any time I
found myself having to ask anyone a question, for fear of being rejected. Most of the
time, all I got was criticism and taunts from
everyone; if I walked down any street, people would shout terrible things at me and
even threw rocks, bottles and eggs at me.
The worst thing about all of this was that
nothing was done about it. I simply did not
exist. I don’t even know if there is a law
nowadays that would condemn anyone for
physically or verbally abusing a homosexual.
What happened at your boarding high
school?

I never said anything to my parents. There
was a guy who would force me to have sex
with him. He would ask me to masturbate
him and put his penis in my mouth. I didn’t
like that, but he threatened to tell everyone
and even to go to the principal’s office to
accuse me of having forced myself on him.
He went to my bunk almost every night.
Thank God, he was found with someone
else and he was expelled.
This kind of thing happened to me frequently. Many men were in the closet and used
violence to get to me. One time, a group of
about fifteen men jumped me where I was
laying down. They were all naked and I
began to cry; their leader took them all to
the bathroom with me, lined them up and
asked me slap each of them on the face. I
did it, but not forcefully. The last one was
the dormitory supervisor, who became quite
excited while watching. I didn’t understand
that either, like so many other things, because I was so young. I couldn’t figure
some things out in that totally alien world.
It was very difficult for me, because I was

I got the scholarship when I was 13. There
were no available beds at the seventh-grade
building, so they sent me to the ninth-grade
one. You can imagine: the boys in ninth
grade were already fully developing but I

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