Feel The Fear & Jump Anyway ? Alexis Written
How to recognize , define and minimize fear in your life .
I still hear the voice . “ Okay ! I ’ m gonna count to three , and you ’ re gonna jump . Are you ready ?” Standing on the ledge ; it felt like I was in mid-air ; no walls to lean back on , and no safety rails to hold on to . Frozen in place ; paralyzed from the fear , I felt my little toes clench the edge of the diving board . Peering down below I could see my swim coach in the deep part of the pool waiting for me to jump . To the left side of the pool ; my mom stood there , and her eyes were filled with excitement . “ Mommy ; I can ’ t … I can ’ t do it I ’ m scared ” I cried . Still standing on the edge of the diving board , I just cried . My mom yelled “ Alexia ! I know you ’ re scared , but feel the fear , and do it anyway ; it ’ s okay !”
“ What ?” I yelled back to her . I heard what she said , but I was just buying time . My mom repeated , I was too afraid to jump in the water , but I couldn ’ t bring myself to come off the diving board . For one , I was too afraid to walk back off the diving board , and second ; I was terrified of heights . My Coach patiently stayed in the water for what seemed to be hours trying his best to assure me that I could jump . He counted to three about a million times it seemed . I stood up there crying , flinching forward wanting to jump but I couldn ’ t . My mom ’ s excitement had now turned into frustration , and the camera was tossed aside . All the other kids had gone home already , and I was still just standing there . As I sniffled my nose I yelled down to my coach and said “ Okay … I think I ’ m ready to jump now .” I wiped my face and made eye contact with my Coach . “ Okay ! You can count to three now ” I said to him from above , as I prepared myself for the jump . My coach started to count “ One … two … three !” he counted , I flinched forward , but I didn ’ t jump . “ Okay coach … One more time , I promise I ’ m gonna jump ” I said confidently . He started to count again . “ One … two … three !” Without any thoughts , and without any hesitation I held my breath , closed my eyes , leaned forward , and jumped off the diving board . There was no panic , no thoughts , just movement . I was filled with excitement . “ I did it . I did it !” Sopping wet I climbed out of the pool running , and skipping over to my mom . “ I did it Mommy ! I jumped off the diving board !” “ Great job Alexia !” she replied . “ I ’ m so proud of you !” needless to say she was quite upset because the moment she looked away was when I had decided to jump , so she never got to take the picture .
How many times in life have we been on the very edge of our greatness , our purpose , our opportunities , and been too afraid to jump ? Standing out on the edge of the diving board of life , extended out into the possibilities of the great unknown . Life is calling you to jump in ; you flinch forward , but you never jump forward . Fear has your feet frozen onto the diving board .
As of today , I am a person who wears many hats ; model , writer , marketer , and public speaker . A couple of weeks ago I ran into someone I haven ’ t seen in over 16 years , and he asked me a question . Alexia , how did you get to accomplish all these things ? I told him I got tired of just playing it safe doing things the traditional way . I was taught to play it safe and have a plan to prevent failure . I realized at the rate I was going I would never be able to achieve anything while holding on to the safety net . It was the releasing of the safety net , jumping out into the world with a thirst to fulfill my purpose that got me to where I am . Each time I jumped ; I took a risk in hopes to fulfill my purpose , and I didn ’ t always land perfectly . It was my imperfect landing that placed me in a situation I would have never been in , had I not taken the leap . There are life lessons that will never be in a book , nor will someone teach you . Only the imperfect landing after the leap will guide you . I believe fear is something that can be recognized and minimized . I do not believe fear is something we should cancel out or “ overcome .” Fear is part of the recipe for greatness in the making . In order for one to recognize and minimize fear , we first need to define what is fear .
Step 1 : What is Fear
Let ’ s start with the definition of fear . The definition of fear is “ an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous .
Psychologytoday . com defines fear as a vital response to physical and emotional danger .” Fear only knows how to protect . Rhonda Britten at the age of 14 was the sole witness to her father shooting her mother dead and then shooting himself . After a long journey of depression , alcoholism and failed suicide attempts ; she found out how to be free emotionally , mentally and spiritually . She later in life became the founder of the Fearless Living Institute . She is a world known public speaker , actress and author . Rhonda best explained fear by saying “ fear thinks you are four years old . It does not know that you are an adult . It does not know your capabilities .” Take me for example ; fear did not know I was more than capable of swimming . It did not factor in all the classes I took before the test . Fear does not know what your purpose is , nor does it know what your dreams are . Fear has poor judgement ; it cannot tell the difference between jumping off the diving board or applying for a job you may feel you don ’ t qualify for . All fear knows is that you feel threatened or uncertain so it does the only thing it knows how to do . It keeps you safe by keeping you stuck , stagnant and frozen in place .
You can unwrap the ropes of fear from around your feet by taking a minute to re-think the situation . Don ’ t get me wrong ; if you are faced with danger of any sort please listen to your instincts . In regards to non-life threatening situations , it is best to re-examine the fear to see if your feelings are valid . Take some time to ask yourself “ What ’ s the worst that can happen ? Why is this situation causing me to be stuck ?” Knowing the definition of fear and how it works is step one so that you recognize it when you see it .
30 IBASuccessMagazine . com