2019 ISSUE #2
ANCIENT PHILOSOPHERS and
contemporary scientists agree: gratitude is
a key ingredient to a happy life.
Research shows that people who cultivate
gratitude get a boost in happiness and
optimism, feel more connected to other
people, are better-liked and have more
friends, and are more likely to help others.
They even sleep better and have fewer
headaches.
Nevertheless, I find it…challenging to
cultivate a grateful frame of mind.
I find it all too easy to fail to appreciate
all the things I feel grateful for — from
pervasive, basic things like electrici-
ty and elevators, to personal aspects
of my life such as the fact that I get to
collaborate with my sister on our podcast,
to little passing joys, like a funny thing
my dog did. I get preoccupied with petty
grievances and minor annoyances and
forget just how much happiness I already
have.
One thing I forget to be grateful for? My
health. For many of us, health — like
money — contributes to happiness mostly
in the negative; the lack of it brings much
more unhappiness than possessing it
brings happiness. It’s very easy to take
money or health for granted — until it's
gone.
HAPPY TO BE HEALTHY
Recently my husband had surgery on
his knee. Minor surgery, something
many people have done, not risky, a very
ordinary procedure, didn't take long. But
boy, the experience of setting foot in a
hospital made me fervently, passionately,
explosively grateful for my health.
Of course, I was also grateful for the
good hospital, the insurance, the doctors
and nurses, the relief from pain that my
husband got, his uncomplicated recovery.
So I was also very grateful for all that, too.
But most of all, I was reminded that I
should never take good health for granted
— my health, or anyone else's. To be able
to take a deep breath, to hear, to see, to
walk, to eat, to be free from pain...it's so
precious.
Another positive consequence of
gratitude? When we're grateful, we tend
to want to make sure that other people
share in whatever we're feeling grateful
for. If I'm feeling grateful for the beauty of
Central Park, it makes me think about how
much I want other people also to be able to
experience the beauty of a park.
Feeling grateful often spurs us to turn
outward, to think about the situations of
others. The trip to the hospital reminded
me of the importance of health — for me,
and for everyone. It made me think about
insurance, medical care, availability (and
of course habits, just about everything
makes me think about habits) and what
steps I can take in my own life, to help
others have these building blocks of good
health.
In Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's famous story,
The Adventure of Silver Blaze, (which
includes the now well-known phrase "the
curious incident of the dog in the night-
time") Sherlock Holmes perceived a clue
in the fact that a dog didn’t bark. I find it
hard to be grateful for the problems that
aren't there. Today is a day that I don't
make a visit to the hospital — a happy day.
I'm also reminded of a hilarious scene
from one of my favorite movies, The
Princess Bride. I've watched the scene
where Count Rugen and Humperdinck
discuss the important things in life, and
it makes me laugh every time. "If you
haven't got your health, you haven't got
anything." It's a cliché, because it's true.
A GOOD GRATITUDE REMINDER.
Do you find it hard to remember to be
grateful? Do you have any strategies
to help prompt gratitude? People use
gratitude journals, screen-saver reminders,
photographs, and giving thanks before
meals...what else? I write about my own
gratitude exercise in The Happiness
Project.
Gretchen Rubin is one of today’s most influential and thought-provoking observers of happiness
and human nature. She’s known for her ability to distill and convey complex ideas with humor
and clarity, in a way that’s accessible to a wide audience.
She’s the author of many books, including the blockbuster New York Times best sellers The Four
Tendencies, Better Than Before and The Happiness Project. She has an enormous readership,
both in print and online, and her books have sold almost three million copies worldwide, in more
than 30 languages. (The Happiness Project spent two years on the best-seller list.)
On her top-ranking, award-winning podcast Happier with Gretchen Rubin, she discusses
happiness and good habits with her sister Elizabeth Craft.
She’s been interviewed by Oprah, eaten dinner with Daniel Kahneman, walked arm-in-arm with
the Dalai Lama, had her work written up in a medical journal, and been an answer on the game
show Jeopardy!
Gretchen Rubin started her career in law and was clerking for Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day
O’Connor when she realized she wanted to be a writer. Raised in Kansas City, she lives in New
York City with her husband; they have two daughters (a college freshman and a seventh-grader).
GretchenRubin.com
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